I learned yesterday that TV chef and storyteller, Anthony Bourdain killed himself yesterday. Seems like it was just the day before that fashion designer Kate Spade ended her life.
I have worked with many people who felt suicidal as well as with many people whose loved ones have taken their own lives and it is just about the most devastating thing I know of.
Inevitably, people who are “left behind” feel that there must have been something they could have done, should have known or must’ve missed. They feel intensely guilty that they didn’t or couldn’t do something to prevent the “waste” of life.
Others feel intensely wounded because they feel as though their connection with the person ought to have been enough for them to live for. They take it personally. They make the meaning of it that if they were more lovable their loved one would have had reason to live.
All of these interpretations are of the ego.
In my understanding based on all my many conversations with the loved ones of those who took their lives and with those who have contemplated taking their life, the reason for suicide is primarily one reason and one only: they feel that life is no longer worth living.
Often, the decision for death happens in a flash. People simply catch a glimpse of a life of misery without end or escape and choose to end their lives.
I remember some years ago L’Wren Scott, fashion designer, model and Mick Jagger girlfriend took her own life.
People so often think that their life would be worth living and so much better if only they were wealthy, famous, talented, or beautiful. It’s absolutely an illusion.
There’s really only one worthwhile reason to live this life, and it’s to grow in the ability to Love through being loving, extending Love, sharing Love and receiving Love.
If we’re not actively extending Love and receiving Love we’re going to feel out of sorts, and out of tune with the infinite. Fortunately, we can extend Love even if we’re all alone and bed ridden. We can be a profoundly loving and light filled presence right where we are, at any moment.
Suicide is no answer to the problem.
Forgiveness IS the answer to the problem.
I had a time when I felt very strongly that I would like to be able to leave this world and I would have done it if it weren’t for the people I love.
I’m so very glad and grateful that the Love of my family and friends was clear enough that I couldn’t make the choice to end my life. I’m so grateful for every part of my journey so far.
There are still times when the intensity of the density of this world discourages me, but I don’t stay there. For the last few years, every night before I go to bed, no matter what I pray and meditate. No matter if I’m falling asleep in the chair while I pray. I stay in my chair until I’m complete. I don’t go to bed without praying for you, me and everyone else. Every day.
I’ve had people take my Finding Freedom Bootcamp and tell me that afterwards they were no longer suicidal. The practices in that class wiped them clean of that level of despair.
I’ve had people I didn’t even know personally call me and tell me they wanted to kill themselves before their children came home from school that day. Self-forgiveness got them out of that mind set. It worked fast.
Self-forgiveness is the way out of most suffering. If you haven’t yet experienced my free How to Get Over It workshop then please, give it a go!
I strongly encourage you to please have a forgiveness party instead of a pity party. Please do it – if not for yourself, then for someone you Love. Be a support to them if it’s not for your own happiness and Freedom, do it for them.
Have a friend or two or three over, have a pot luck, order in some great take out, listen to the workshop and do the work right there together and share. Do it with your sister, your brother, your neighbor.
What a powerful gift you’ll give yourselves and it costs you nothing except the time, energy and food – and it can bring you a deep and lasting healing. It’s the best anti-inflammatory and the best anti-aging method there is!
Here’s what I absolutely know: Your life is worth living. You are a treasure to God and to me. Let’s live our destiny. Let’s do it together!
We’re waking up together and finding freedom in our hearts. I’m so grateful for this!
If you find what I’m sharing helpful, won’t you please share at facebook and twitter to let’s other know? Thank you!