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I’ve learned so much about being able to change my mind.
When I first quit smoking – which I’ve done several times – it was excruciating. It was so challenging. I went on sheer will power. I had to work my will very intensely to get myself to quit smoking.
Why was it so darn hard for me to stop smoking? I didn’t really desire to quit. I quit because I thought I SHOULD I quit. It was all ego.
Years later, I started smoking again, and then I quit again. It wasn’t as hard to quit this time, but it was still really challenging – a long drawn out suffering.
A decade went by and I started smoking again and then I decided to really quit. This time, I truly didn’t want to smoke. It was so easy to stop when I actually didn’t want to smoke. There was no SHOULD. It was simply my true authentic desire to live smoke-free. No will power was required. It was simply a decision. That’s Spirit. I have no interest in smoking anymore. I’m done.
For so long I resisted doing the very things I knew would support my spiritual growth. I would should all over myself all day long with what i should be doing or not doing.
I would say over and over again that I wanted to have more spiritual clarity and expansion and yet I would do the very things I knew would lead me the other way. At the time I felt like something was wrong with me and that I would never get to where I wished to go. I lived in that space for MANY years.
Now, I can see that I was learning, deeply learning and that it was all for my good. While I’d do it all differently now that I’ve learned so much – I don’t look back and WISH that I’d done it differently. I don’t look back much except when I’m sharing the learning.
For many years I thought I had to work so dang hard to get to a spiritual awareness of Truth. The belief that it’s hard is so strong among spiritual students. I wrestled with that one a LONG time.
All I really had to do was surrender the attachments, the false beliefs, the needing, wanting and craving and ALLOW the gift of pure spirit to reveal the perfection I AM.
AND I couldn’t do it because I SHOULD DO IT, I could only do it when I changed my mind and really desired to do it. And then …
My practice became a constant surrender.
My practice became a constant release of attachment.
My practice became total gratitude.
My practice became a true willingness.
The more I practiced, the easier it became. The practice felt INTENSELY challenging, but it got so much easier than struggling.
Yes, it was a struggle for what seemed like a long while. The ego has a constant craving, but the Spirit is much stronger than the ego. It’s like quitting smoking. It’s not hard at all if it’s really what you desire. If there’s no SHOULD there’s no resistance, no ego, just your heart’s desire to be free.
You can decide to let all the SHOULDS dissolve out of your mind and your life. Shoulds are habits. Train the mind to be a SHOULD-FREE ZONE ALLOW the Love to flow through your life and follow the path of Love. It takes willingness and learning to be able to do this, and it is your natural ability to do so. Allow the Spirit of Love to be your guide and it most certainly will be. Love is all that you are.
Choosing again is the topic of this week’s classes in Living A Course in Miracles – Gary Renard, author of Disappearance of the Universe was our teacher this week. We’ve got two free classes this week and the replays are available now! Let’s go for it! We’re getting our healing ON!