Problem Solving

March 24, 2019
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In A Course in Miracles, we’re taught to look at whether it’s even possible to get what we’d like using the means we’ve chosen.  For instance, so often in my past I’d feel hurt in a relationship because of my interpretation of what occurred.  Then, in order to try to manipulate and punish people to treat me “better”, I’d shut them out, I’d shut them down, and I’d blame them for how I felt.  I’d try to make them feel guilty.  

How crazy was I that I ever thought that could bring me the Peace and Love I wanted from my relationships?  

The answer is:  completely crazy.

I was out of my right mind and operating from the WRONG mind.

I’ve realized that I’m always either constructive or destructive in my contribution to life.  It can be subtle and challenging to discern, but since I desire to make a positive contribution wherever possible, since I intend to be the bringer of Love and Light, I’m committed to paying attention to even the most subtle waves of energy I’m sending.

In Trumpet of Conscience, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. says, “Means and ends must cohere because the end is preexistent in the means, and ultimately destructive means cannot bring about constructive ends.” 

How frequently do I think about whether or not my actions are constructive?  

Answer:  All day long.  

I can feel the shift immediately when I change my mind.  I instantly feel more peaceful, more loving and relieved.  

For my success as a spiritual student, all that’s required is for me to be awake in the moment.  To be awake in the moment requires my willingness.  I’m willing to be awake.  I desire to be awake.

How many times have I failed because I tried to solve a problem without considering whether or not my solution was actually constructive or merely a band-aid?  Millions.

Sometimes what I’ve done to make things better has been reactionary, borne of a fear of what might happen. Sometimes I’ve known that what I was doing was actually destructive, and I’ve gone ahead and done it anyway in order to get a temporary feeling of resolution. This is what I see others doing all the time. We especially see it in politics.  People use violence as a quick way to attempt to end violence. It never brings Peace, but they try it again anyway.

ACIM teaches us that the ends is in the means.  Does your desire match your means to get there or is it merely a wish?  

A Course in Miracles tells us: “How can one be sincere and say, ‘I want this above all else, and yet I do not want to learn the means to get it?’  To obtain the goal the Holy Spirit indeed asks little.  He asks no more to give the means as well.  The means are second to the goal.  And when you hesitate, it is because the purpose frightens you, and not the means.”

The bottom line is:

If I have a problem and I try to solve it with anything other than Love, I will still have a problem.

In other words, “What goes around, comes around.” 

I used to resist the truth that every thought is my choice.  I used to prefer to step back from taking responsibility for every thought I had.  And yet, in taking that responsibility is the very power to change my life.  

I used to feel powerless yet resist the one thing that would empower me:  Responsibility.  That’s where having a strong aspiration serves me.   

I desire to serve the Light with every choice I make.  I am willing to take responsibility for every choice I make.  

Can you be fearless and look over your choices and see if they can actually bring you the outcome you most desire?  

Are you at all like I was, choosing to punish with guilt, anger, resentment and withdrawal instead of extending Love, compassion and kindness?  Can you see where your methods will never bring you your heart’s desire?

Would you be willing to write a forgiveness letter to yourself about it so you can move on from this stuck place?  If so, download my forgiveness letter template and get to it today.  Don’t delay your own relief from suffering.

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