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I was talking with a friend, one time, who was having a conversation by text with his sweetheart. They were texting about something that was a frustration for them both, and it was showing in their text messages. My friend read me the messages, and it was clear his boyfriend was annoyed with him. My friend was feeling annoyed by the messages and wanted to respond in kind, which is understandable.
Relationships are degraded by these kinds of annoying exchanges.
It’s really easy to wear down the beauty of a relationship with sarcasm. Sarcasm always interrupts intimacy because it makes us feel unsafe.
When we enter into to conversations with comments like: “You forgot to put out the trash AGAIN!” we need to know that what we’re doing is making an effort to make the other person feel bad, guilty, wrong, and shamed. It’s not truly helpful. And, it takes away the sweetness, as well as the safety and intimacy, of our connections.
Who would like to open themselves in deep intimacy with someone who sometimes lashes out at them with sarcasm? No one I know.
Let’s make it a safe space for all of our loved ones and make a commitment to not text or e-mail our annoyances. Let’s also completely stop blaming other people for our upsets.
We can only have holy relationships if we are willing to let them be wholly loving.
This is how we become a catalyst for healing.
Who’s willing to really commit to this? Please tell us about it and share in the comments below! Let’s join together for our healing! Thank you!