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We’re in February now, and this is the month that I devote all the episodes of my podcast to relationships. My topic today is “Healing the Relationship Fear Triggers” and it’s such a good one! (By the way, you can easily search in the archive of my podcast for episodes on relationship – there are SO many.)
Getting triggered in relationship is normal, and it’s pretty constant for most people.
Each one of these triggers is a point where we could choose permanent and lasting healing – or we can repeat the same patterns and have more of the same experience.
When we get triggered, this is the time to choose again and choose something different. After all, we’re never upset for the reason we think and, in truth, we really don’t know what anything is for. These are the most helpful teachings of A Course in Miracles.
One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves and share with others is the ability to be calm and have patience. This doesn’t mean denying how we feel. We can learn to feel our feelings without exploding and without dumping them all over people, AND without stuffing them.
Once I realized that each and every upset COULD be a point of healing if I ALLOWED it to be, I started to approach my life in an entirely different way. I made healing a priority. I made Peace, calm and patience a priority.
It does take a real willingness, and it does take courage to break from the habits of the past. We have knee-jerk reactions because we haven’t healed the underlying beliefs.
Our work isn’t behavior modification. Let’s not settle for that. We’re going for a healing of the root cause, whatever it is, so that we can be completely free of the triggers forever.
If we settle for behavior modification, we’re giving up on the profound healing that’s available to us. When we settle, we’re not in that Partnership with the Higher Holy Spirit Self.
When we feel connected to Spirit, then we can have the courage to heal. We can put Spirit in charge.
I used to get SO triggered and I’d say the meanest things.
I used to shut people out and punish them for triggering me.
I used to attack people and then feel ashamed.
These patterns are THICK, they are intense – AND they can dissolve and resolve so easily when we trust Spirit to heal them.
It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. We can have healing in all of the consequences of our wrong decisions, and the wrong decisions of others. It’s a great investment of our trust and faith. When we really trust, we have real results.