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Example: We think someone should go to college rather than start their own business, and so we work against them having what they’d like and discourage them. We convince ourselves that we’re only doing what’s best for them because we love them.
In reality, we want them to do what we think they should do and we’re trying to control and manipulate them.
Is it helpful?
Here’s another example: Someone is having a difficult time and we rescue them so they don’t have to struggle.
We think we’re helping, but is it actually helpful?
Someone is doing something that seems embarrassing. It seems that they will be looking foolish, but we don’t want to interfere so we don’t say anything. Is it helpful?
What about when we do say something and it’s very hurtful, but saves them from humiliation. Is it helpful?
Life is filled with choices like this.
I’ve learned to ask this simple question: What’s most helpful here?
Another way to ask it is: How can I be helpful?
Another way to ask is: What’s the highest and best in this situation?
I like being helpful.
A Course in Miracles tells us that our purpose is to be helpful.
How will you be helpful today?