Archive for the ‘Acceptance’ Category

Healing The Unconscious Guilt

Friday, September 11th, 2020

Lately, I’ve been noticing so many more places where the unconscious guilt that A Course in Miracles talks about is driving people’s choices and they have no idea of it. There are so many patterns of pain and negativity playing out throughout our days that we’re not even aware of.

Yesterday I wrote about feeling insecure.

Insecurity comes directly from the unconscious guilt patterns.

It takes up so much of our bandwidth and yet we don’t even realize that’s the real issue.

In our essence, we’re all perfect Spirit poured into different expressions of human experience.

Somewhere along the journey, we gave ourselves permission to judge, to sort, separate and label. The more we see each other as separate, different, wrong, bad, better or worse, the more our perspective is skewed and we cannot see correctly.

We’ve cultivated a distorted perspective of being better than, worse then and separate from, and because we’ve done it on purpose, intentionally cultivating this false view of ourselves and others, we feel badly. Deep down, every one of us feels guilty for giving ourselves permission to attack others, and ourselves, with thoughts of better and worse, when deep down, we do know that we’re one with each other and not separate.

It’s an ancient guilt that we’re in the process of healing.

This ancient guilt is why we all feel less than perfectly lovable and believe it’s true even though it’s not.

We’re one with each other.

Can I possibly believe that you are less than lovable and not believe it of myself?

If deep down, I know that you and I are one, how can I actually believe that it’s possible to paint you as bad and wrong and not paint myself that way too?

Well, here’s how – we made a divide in our mind. We made a split.
We can call it right mind and wrong mind.
Clear mind and distorted mind.

With the split in our mind, we can now see ourselves as separate from each other, but it has a HUGE cost to pay in order to make the illusion of the split possible. We had to also agree that we were separate from Spirit. It was the only way.

What we didn’t realize was that the split in our mind would also prevent us from feeling our God-nature. All of our gifts that are essential to our living a joyful life would be hidden from us on the other side of the split.

In our awareness of oneness and union in Spirit we’re able to access our true divine nature and experience the many gifts of God. These gifts are our natural state of being. They are sometimes seen as colored rays of light, like the aspects of light we see in a rainbow. They are the spiritual qualities of being that we truly are such as:

  • Love
  • Joy
  • Freedom
  • Wisdom
  • Clarity
  • Peace
  • Harmony
  • Beauty
  • Wholeness
  • Prosperity
  • Purity
  • Abundance
  • And more

When we seek the kingdom first, when we put Spirit first, then all of these spiritual qualities are now awake and available in our mind. This is our true Abundance, remembering our lineage, our ancestry, our inheritance!

Our way back to our true reality is being willing to recognize what is false and stop identifying with a smaller, weaker, selfish self. We are truly miraculous beings of Love and Light and our destiny is to remember the kingdom is within. Let’s look for our blessings where we can find them, already pre-installed, within.

Instead of looking for separation and differences, let’s look for similarities and unity.

I’m getting ready for my Stop Playing Small Online Retreat on September 18.

If you’d really like to do this healing work of letting go of complaints and the other things that stand in our way of happiness and Peace, consider joining me. You can change your entire life, your relationships, your experience, your finances, your body, your happiness and peace of mind. Consider this:

You will never regret your choice, and you’ll only be so glad you did – at least that’s what I hear from the people who have done it.

Get going. Take action. Be aggressive about working with your mind. DO NOT DELAY. If you’re waiting, if you’re not getting the results you’d like, what are you waiting for?

Don’t take my word for it, read the testimonials from those who have done this work with me. They believed that nothing would work for them, and they were willing to do something different anyway. Now, they’re not playing small anymore. They’re not letting fear dictate their life. They have a real and powerful connection with Spirit.

If you’re ready to make a change, and you’d like some REAL support to make a LASTING change, TAKE ACTION! If you’re interested in either my Stop Playing Small Online Retreat or Finding Freedom From Fear Online Spiritual Bootcamp, but you aren’t sure if either is right for you right now, book an Exploratory Call with one of the spiritual counselors. The call is free and you’ll find benefit in addition to getting all your questions answered. Click here now to book an Exploratory Call with a Spiritual Counselor.

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Insecure

Thursday, September 10th, 2020

I used to be an insecure person.  I didn’t know it, and would never have believed it, but the cause of my insecurity was my constant judging.  My mind was rarely out of attack mode and that left me feeling vulnerable most of the time.  

When I look back, it’s amazing how much energy I invested each day in defending myself and attacking others.  It’s a wonder I got anything accomplished at all!

I see many people who fritter their life and inner resources away keeping score in their relationships instead of being ALL IN for Love.  You know your affection is conditional when you have expectations and make demands.

Sometimes folks who feel insecure will poke and poke others to agitate and get others to reject them.  It’s classic.  People who have abandonment issues will push others away.  We do all these crazy things to prove that what we believe is true.

BUT it does NOT prove what we believe is true.

All it proves is that we believe it and so we’re experiencing it.

If you REALLY look at it, what IS proved is that we’re powerful manifesters!

It can be really exhausting and tiresome to have someone you love pushing you away.

However, once realize that it’s a cry for Love and they don’t really know what they’re doing we can drop our judgments and love them.

Some people have a difficult time letting you love them.  

It’s like that old Woody Allen joke “I’d never join a club that would allow me to become a member.”  

They don’t trust and it doesn’t feel safe.  They’re anticipating rejection and so they will do their dance until you agree they aren’t worth it.  They can be so insistent.  

Life is filled with these experiences and as long as we don’t judge it, we’ll continue to have less and less of them.  We’re here to be truly helpful.  The most helpful thing we can be is both compassionate AND having healthy boundaries.

Some people will begin to relax when they see you really do love them.

And some people aren’t ready to accept it.  This is when we do our work in the invisible – our prayer practice and our forgiveness.  It’s powerful and life-changing.  

Let’s not invest ourselves in these ego games anymore – we have more fulfilling ways to invest our time and energy!

Have you had the experience I’m talking about?  Please tell us about it and share in the comments below!  Let’s join together for our healing!  Thank you!

I’m getting ready for my Stop Playing Small Online Retreat on September 18.

If you’d really like to do this healing work of letting go of complaints and the other things that stand in our way of happiness and Peace, consider joining me. You can change your entire life, your relationships, your experience, your finances, your body, your happiness and peace of mind. Consider this:

You will never regret your choice, and you’ll only be so glad you did – at least that’s what I hear from the people who have done it.

Get going. Take action. Be aggressive about working with your mind. DO NOT DELAY. If you’re waiting, if you’re not getting the results you’d like, what are you waiting for?

Don’t take my word for it, read the testimonials from those who have done this work with me. They believed that nothing would work for them, and they were willing to do something different anyway. Now, they’re not playing small anymore. They’re not letting fear dictate their life. They have a real and powerful connection with Spirit.

If you’re ready to make a change, and you’d like some REAL support to make a LASTING change, TAKE ACTION! If you’re interested in either my Stop Playing Small Online Retreat or Finding Freedom From Fear Online Spiritual Bootcamp, but you aren’t sure if either is right for you right now, book an Exploratory Call with one of the spiritual counselors. The call is free and you’ll find benefit in addition to getting all your questions answered. Click here now to book an Exploratory Call with a Spiritual Counselor.

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Mean Intent

Tuesday, September 8th, 2020

Bobbi, my brother’s new puppy dog, Bobbi – just about 8 months old – ate my slipper yesterday.  Sigh.  I really liked that slipper and they don’t make them anymore.  Isn’t that how it goes sometimes?  

I have to say, it gave me a moment of feeling pissed.  All attachments cause suffering – that’s the teaching of Buddha.  

Of course, I was annoyed with myself for having taken it off in a place where she could get it.  Life!!  I could have been upset the rest of the day – but what good would that do?

There are times when we say we’d like the Peace of God, but, sometimes, we really don’t. Have you ever had someone cut you off in traffic and you wished they get caught by the police?  Have you ever had someone disappoint you and you wished them some kind of difficulty?

Okay, this may sound crazy to you, but I’ve known many people, including myself, who have, at times of stress, wished for bad things to happen.

I’ve even known people who’ve wished for “bad” things to happen to themselves so they could feel even more like a victim and get sympathy from others.  It’s that old pattern of wanting negative attention if there’s no positive attention available.  

Wishing for bad things to happen to someone else is more understandable for most people than wishing bad things to happen to themselves.

Wishing bad things on anyone is wishing for a punishment.

And that’s one of the key components of the ego thought system.

The ego thought system is one of sin and punishment.

When people don’t like what someone’s done, they jump on the punishment bandwagon.  People talk about punishment as a deterrent, but it really doesn’t work.

Punishment is for those who blame and shame.  

You may not realize it, because we often don’t wish to see it, but many people punish themselves and punish others as a way of trying to handle how vulnerable and powerless they feel.  There are many subtle ways that people punish themselves and others.  

Hoping something bad happens to themselves, people are often looking to get some kind of justification for feeling like a victim, or even to punish others.  When I was much younger, I definitely saw myself wishing for bad things to happen to me so that others would feel bad, that it was their fault.  

Some people try to hurt their loved ones by hurting themselves.  It’s definitely insane.  And that’s what the ego is, pure insanity.  

People feel unworthy of Love and sometimes they wish for something bad to happen to them so that people will have sympathy for them.  They feel it’s the only way they can get attention or kindness.  It never feels good, but, to some, it’s better than no attention all.

Wishing punishment on others only intensifies the guilt we feel, and then we feel we deserve to be punished.  It’s a destructive cycle we can break out of by being aware and practicing kindness.

His Holiness, the Dalai Lama has said that his religion is kindness.  That really resonates with me.  I aspire to be kind always and I am getting closer every day.  When we’re forgiving ourselves and others, we’re practicing the ultimate kindness.  

Forgiveness leads to compassion, and that’s Love.  It’s liberating.

In our current political climate, I’ve heard people wishing for economic hard times because they believe then the current president wouldn’t be reelected.  I get that, but it’s not what I wish for.  I wish for Love and kindness to be valued.  I pray that truth is revealed and Love prevails.  I feel it happening and so I don’t even need to hope for good.  I know it is happening now.  

Healing is happening now.  

Truth is being revealed now.  

Love will prevail.  

Have you had a time when you wished for something bad to happen to someone or to yourself?  Have you forgiven yourself?  If not, there’s no time like the present!  Please share in the comments below!

I’m getting ready for my Stop Playing Small Online Retreat on September 18. If you’d really like to do this healing work of letting go of complaints and the other things that stand in our way of happiness and Peace, consider joining me. You can change your entire life, your relationships, your experience, your finances, your body, your happiness and peace of mind. Consider this:

You won’t regret your choice, and you’ll only be so glad you did – at least that’s what I hear from the people who’ve done it.  

Get going.  Take action.  Be aggressive about working with your mind.  DO NOT DELAY.  If you’re waiting, if you’re not getting the results you’d like, what are you waiting for?

Don’t take my word for it, read the testimonials from those who have done this work with me.  They believed that nothing would work for them, and they were willing to do something different anyway.  Now, they’re not playing small anymore.  They’re not letting fear dictate their life.  They have a real and powerful connection with Spirit.

If you’re ready to make a change, and you’d like some REAL support to make a LASTING change, TAKE ACTION! If you’re interested in either my Stop Playing Small Online Retreat or Finding Freedom From Fear Online Spiritual Bootcamp, but you aren’t sure if either is right for you right now, book an Exploratory Call with one of the spiritual counselors. The call is free and you’ll find benefit in addition to getting all your questions answered. Click here now to book an Exploratory Call with a Spiritual Counselor.

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Not Waiting Anymore

Thursday, August 13th, 2020

My beautiful friend, Laurie Schur is a poet, filmmaker, therapist, and all-round beautiful woman and she often shares wonderful and inspiring things with me like this poem.  

Life at Midlife

I am no longer waiting for a special occasion; I burn the best candles on ordinary days.

I am no longer waiting for the house to be clean; I fill it with people who understand that even dust is Sacred.

I am no longer waiting for everyone to understand me; it’s just not their task.

I am no longer waiting for *the perfect children; my children have their own names that burn as brightly as any star.

I am no longer waiting for the other shoe to drop; It already did, and I survived.

I am no longer waiting for the time to be right; the time is always now.

I am no longer waiting for the mate who will complete me; I am grateful to be so warmly, tenderly held.

I am no longer waiting for a quiet moment; my heart can be stilled whenever it is called.

I am no longer waiting for the world to be at peace; I unclench my grasp and breathe peace in and out.

I am no longer waiting to do something great; being awake to carry my grain of sand is enough.

I am no longer waiting to be recognized; I know that I dance in a holy circle.

I am no longer waiting for Forgiveness.

I believe, I Believe. 

Mary Anne Perrone

In reading this beautiful poem, I’m so clear that I too am no longer waiting for things that I used to wait for when I was a younger woman.  

I like to use the good china even if it’s just me.  

I’m not waiting for a special occasion.

I can tell people I love them, without an excuse.   

I love you.

I am grateful!

I am choosing to remember that I’m already as holy as holy can be and I’m not waiting to get there!

I am choosing to realize that I am already free and to go there in my mind – no more waiting!

If you’d like to get some inspiration, and also support this ministry, you can sign up for daily inspirational text messages. You can make a one-time donation for as little as $1 or set up a recurring donation to support this ministry as an active tither. These texts are such a blessing to me – I get them every day and I love them. They always seem to come with the perfect timing! Divine timing! Click here now to learn more.

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No Comparison

Friday, July 3rd, 2020

When I lived in West Hollywood, I took yoga classes with models and movie stars. The competition for the title of “the most beautiful woman in the room” was intense. The more beautiful women there were, the more insecure women there were. It was a real learning for me.

In yoga class, it was easy to fall into comparing myself to others who were not only fitter than me, more attractive by cultural standards and more famous.

I haven’t ever been able to do a handstand. Many of the women in class with me could easily do handstands. I learned to say to myself “I can do that. Just not today.” It helped me to get over my comparisons.

One of the biggest points of pain we have is the suffering we experience caused by the habit of comparing ourselves to others. Only the ego compares. The heart knows we are united in Oneness.

When we’re comparing ourselves to others, more often than not we’re looking to come up short. We’re intending to find ourselves as failing. It’s an act of self-sabotage. It’s adding insult to injury. Can it possibly bring any benefit? No. None. It’s just a trick of the ego to help us feel more separate.

Comparison always leads to more suffering.

Whether we compare and think we’ve come out ahead or come out lacking, since there’s only one, either way we just feel more separate.

If I love my friend, would I encourage them to compare themselves to someone who seems better than them or more special? I would never say to a friend, “you’re not the best cook. I know a few other people I like better than you who are also much better cooks. You’re not so great. You’re just ok.”

Of course I wouldn’t say that to someone I cared about.
But people say things like that to themselves ALL THE TIME.

And it hurts!
It wears us down.

Comparison is judgment. All judgment is for the purpose of reinforcing separation. All belief in separation causes feelings of fear. Comparison is PURE separation thinking.

Let’s have an active practice of relating to others rather than comparing.

Let’s get into feeling the unity of all life.

Let’s watch our mind when it comes to comparing, attacking and needing or wanting to be better than someone else. The habit of comparing can be really sneaky, but since there’s no good that can come of it, just let it go every time you see it.

I find one of the best ways to let a negative thought pattern go is to make myself laugh about it. So, that’s why in my classes we say “compare and despair.” The rhyme helps us to be light-hearted and to remember to laugh. And let’s face it, it also reminds not to go down the road of despair!

There’s great healing that can come from our spiritual practice and it’s a benefit to all beings!

If you’d like to have a major increase in your choosing self-Love and kindness, you might like my Finding Freedom From Fear, spiritual boot camp class with ACIM principles. I haven’t offered this class in 9 months – this is your chance, if you’d like to join me and GO FOR IT!

PLUS, I’m recording all new classes.

If this is right for you right now, you’ll know it.

Trust your intuition! If you’ve been thinking about doing my Finding Freedom From Fear Boot camp for a while, but just haven’t been ready, consider booking an exploratory call with one of the spiritual counselors. They can answer all your questions and you’ll know what’s best for you. Book an exploratory call today!

My Finding Freedom From Fear spiritual boot camp isn’t for everyone – it’s for those who are willing to dive in and live the Love. Click here now to learn more.

We begin MONDAY, July 6! With a BONUS CLASS on July 5th. This is going to be SO good because I am ON FIRE!

Let’s have REAL and lasting transformation this summer with spiritual practice that brings benefit and healing for all. Now is the time for us to dive deep and eliminate the patterns of fear in our life. I thank you for being on the journey with me!

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Symptoms of Unworthiness

Sunday, September 22nd, 2019

I remember the very first weekend of ministerial school at the Ernest Holmes Institute. It was this time of year, in 2001. It was right around 9/11. We were on a retreat at Casa de Maria in Santa Barbara, California and Rev. Nirvana Gayle was the leader. I was so excited because I thought we’d be entering into a mystical training following in the footsteps of Ernest Holmes who inspired me so much.

That turned out not to be the case. It was a very intellectual program, with no study of Holmes or mysticism. However, because of my experiences, I now teach in a very different way from that and it has been tremendously successful and I’m so grateful for that.

That first weekend, two things stand out to me. One is that we were told that of the thirty or so people at the retreat only about five of us would be ministers 10 years from graduation. That statistic shocked me. I couldn’t imagine not being a minister. I couldn’t imagine going through all that training – pre-practitioner, practitioner, and then ministerial school – 9 years total – and then not being a minister.

In my senior year, I switched from the Holmes Institute to the Agape school, as Agape withdrew from what is now called Centers for Spiritual Living. I graduated in 2006. There was 1 other graduate with me and he’s still a minister too.

I love ministry. It is definitely my calling. I so love being able to support people from being caught in their ego identity, illness, and despair over their life, relationships, careers, and bodies into becoming miracle minded and truly living the principles of A Course in Miracles. Quite literally, it thrills me! I feel so grateful and so blessed each and every day.

I feel like I have cracked the code on how to live the life you really desire and I see more and more people doing it around me. The reports of folks in my classes and of how their families are healing all around them is my favorite thing. It’s so completely not rocket science, but it does require real willingness to be vigilant over their thoughts.

Which is why this work is not for everyone. Many people are simply not willing to be vigilant over their thoughts. They imagine that it’s too hard. It’s not. It is demanding though. But being miserable is demanding too. Thinking your life is hard and you’re not worthy of Love is even more demanding and has NO benefits. I know, I used to live in that space.

The other thing that I recall from that first weekend of ministerial school is we were asked to tell the group what we were most grateful for. That was easy for me. I am SO VERY grateful for my awareness. I am grateful that I’m ever more aware of my ability to choose. I don’t have to suffer unless I choose to. We can rise above the battlefield of ego consciousness. We really can.

Cultivating the ability to GENUINELY be aware of our thoughts is to living a miraculous life what stretching and exercising are to have a healthy body. Many people satisfy themselves with reading about spirituality and listening to audios about spirituality. They don’t break a sweat. There’s no real exercise in it.

It’s like getting a gym membership, putting on your exercise outfit, going to the gym and watching everyone else workout while reading a book about what they’re doing and then listening to audio about what they did and how they did it. It’s armchair spirituality. We can have gained without pain, but we cannot grow without doing the inner work.

That’s why having a great trainer to go with you, who keeps you company and makes it fun is so helpful. Having a workout posse to join with you is even better. That’s why I organize my classes the way I do. To make it fun, and get it done. For real.

We all have a personal trainer in the Higher Holy Spirit Self, but you have to be willing to do what the trainer advises. And that personal trainer that we ALL have, is always telling us to be loving to ourselves because we are worthy of Love. Every one of us. That is always true and never changes. All are worthy.

Unworthiness is the most chronic illness that people have in this world.

It attacks us mentally and emotionally – but only if we agree. It has no power if we don’t agree.

Symptoms of unworthiness are:

  • Not trusting intuition
  • Second-guessing yourself
  • Attacking yourself
  • Letting people take advantage of you
  • People pleasing
  • Giving to others and doing for others in order to get approval
  • Hiding and isolating
  • Letting people treat you poorly
  • Feeling unappreciated

I had all of these. I see very little of this happening anymore. What a relief!

If you’ve had enough of these things in your life – consider accepting my gift. I’m offering a LIVE VIDEO 2.5-hour workshop intensive next Saturday with a replay on Sunday and it’s my gift to you. There’s no cost, but you do have to register. Click here to register now.

Worthiness Workshop
Saturday or Sunday
September 28 or 29th
Los Angeles, 12pm ♥ Chicago, 2pm ♥ New York, 3pm ♥ London, 8pm
♥ Germany, 9pm ♥ Sydney, 5am (next day) ♥ Hong Kong, 3am (next day)

This workshop is for people who are interested in making a change. When you register, I’ll send you a worksheet that you’ll need to set aside some time to fill out and bring to the workshop to be able to get the benefits.

I’m all in for YOU. Will you meet me and we’ll have some fun with our healing together?

Please invite a friend or two and do the worksheets together. Invite your ACIM Study Group and let’s do this together! You can also listen to the last two weeks of Conquering Unworthiness episodes of my podcast. Click here to listen now and get the transcripts too!

Transformation is REALLY fun and it’s also a huge relief when we do it together. It’s such a relief to let go of the false identity and stand in the beauty of our true nature. We truly can be helpful and we can teach only Love. I’m going for it. Come join me!

If you see an announcement for this on my facebook page would you please SHARE it so more people find it?

Let’s make the most of every opportunity for our healing and awakening and remember to laugh when we forget. Every day I offer my shot of Spiritual Espresso. I write spiritual inspiration and record a prayer for our healing. Prayer is a powerful tool for our liberation. Please pray with me today. We use technology to transcend time and space and deepen our spiritual practice and connect with each other. Our spiritual practice is our path of liberation. And that’s beautiful to share!

We’re all on a journey of developing trust and faith and there’s so much help for us in the invisible. We’re never alone. I Love you and I thank God for you. We bless each other with our willingness to rise in Spirit and come back into our right minds. Together we’re answering our call to BE the Love. YES!

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