When I lived in West Hollywood, I took yoga classes with models and movie stars. The competition for the title of “the most beautiful woman in the room” was intense. The more beautiful women there were, the more insecure women there were. It was a real learning for me.
In yoga class, it was easy to fall into comparing myself to others who were not only fitter than me, more attractive by cultural standards and more famous.
I haven’t ever been able to do a handstand. Many of the women in class with me could easily do handstands. I learned to say to myself “I can do that. Just not today.” It helped me to get over my comparisons.
One of the biggest points of pain we have is the suffering we experience caused by the habit of comparing ourselves to others. Only the ego compares. The heart knows we are united in Oneness.
When we’re comparing ourselves to others, more often than not we’re looking to come up short. We’re intending to find ourselves as failing. It’s an act of self-sabotage. It’s adding insult to injury. Can it possibly bring any benefit? No. None. It’s just a trick of the ego to help us feel more separate.
Comparison always leads to more suffering.
Whether we compare and think we’ve come out ahead or come out lacking, since there’s only one, either way we just feel more separate.
If I love my friend, would I encourage them to compare themselves to someone who seems better than them or more special? I would never say to a friend, “you’re not the best cook. I know a few other people I like better than you who are also much better cooks. You’re not so great. You’re just ok.”
Of course I wouldn’t say that to someone I cared about.
But people say things like that to themselves ALL THE TIME.
And it hurts!
It wears us down.
Comparison is judgment. All judgment is for the purpose of reinforcing separation. All belief in separation causes feelings of fear. Comparison is PURE separation thinking.
Let’s have an active practice of relating to others rather than comparing.
Let’s get into feeling the unity of all life.
Let’s watch our mind when it comes to comparing, attacking and needing or wanting to be better than someone else. The habit of comparing can be really sneaky, but since there’s no good that can come of it, just let it go every time you see it.
I find one of the best ways to let a negative thought pattern go is to make myself laugh about it. So, that’s why in my classes we say “compare and despair.” The rhyme helps us to be light-hearted and to remember to laugh. And let’s face it, it also reminds not to go down the road of despair!
There’s great healing that can come from our spiritual practice and it’s a benefit to all beings!
If you’d like to have a major increase in your choosing self-Love and kindness, you might like my Finding Freedom From Fear, spiritual boot camp class with ACIM principles. I haven’t offered this class in 9 months – this is your chance, if you’d like to join me and GO FOR IT!
PLUS, I’m recording all new classes.
If this is right for you right now, you’ll know it.
Trust your intuition! If you’ve been thinking about doing my Finding Freedom From Fear Boot camp for a while, but just haven’t been ready, consider booking an exploratory call with one of the spiritual counselors. They can answer all your questions and you’ll know what’s best for you. Book an exploratory call today!
We begin MONDAY, July 6! With a BONUS CLASS on July 5th. This is going to be SO good because I am ON FIRE!
Let’s have REAL and lasting transformation this summer with spiritual practice that brings benefit and healing for all. Now is the time for us to dive deep and eliminate the patterns of fear in our life. I thank you for being on the journey with me!