Archive for the ‘Relationships’ Category

Relationship Hell

Sunday, October 11th, 2020

Relationship hell? I’ve been there. I’ve explored it in many ways, traversing the downs and way downs of it. When I was younger, as a child, a teen ager and until about age 30, I would get so angry that I felt what I describe as a murderous rage.

I’d become so upset, so threatened, and so afraid of being hurt that all I could feel was fury and desperation. My upset was like a hurricane, searching for some way to calm down, but only picking up speed and becoming more and more dangerous. I would frighten myself I’d be so upset.

I’d become so loud, and mean and desperate, without any self-control, that I’d rage until I was too tired to continue. Reaching exhaustion was the only thing that would get me to stop. My family’s or boyfriend’s attempts to control me would only make me infuriated. It was awful.

Once exhausted, I would collapse into a puddle of my own despair. I’d be consumed by self-hatred and fear of myself. It was all proof that something was horribly, uncontrollably wrong with me. I was beyond hope, or so I was convinced.

I learned to accept that this was just who I was, what I was. I felt like a bad seed. I felt like there was some kind of demon in me and that terrified me. That fear was so intense that I couldn’t handle any kind of criticism or teasing. I learned to be very focused on self-preservation.

What I can understand now, that I didn’t understand then, is that it was extremely important that I learn how to have no other authority. I needed to be my own authority. No one could boss me around or intimidate me. When I was younger, it meant that I was always in a fight with the people I was “rebelling” against.

Now, I can see that I wasn’t really a rebel at all. I was maintaining my sovereignty. When I finally reached the point where I could make Spirit the authority in my life and really listen to that still small voice, I had the ability to walk in the world without being pulled this way and that by other people’s opinions. My mind was able to be strong and focused, following Spirit’s guidance.

Historically, if you look at many of the mystics, you can see that they appeared to be rebels too. That wasn’t their intention. It just looked that way.

Unfortunately, I went through many seasons of relationship hell where I felt completely unlovable. I felt excruciatingly bad and wrong so much of the time – but that didn’t stop me from acting out. I was frequently mean and cruel in defense of my insecurities. Now, I have great compassion for people who behave that way and I can really help them to break out of it.

I learned to try to control everything around me, constantly monitoring, to keep from being manipulated and controlled by others. I learned to always be on the offense as my best form of defense. It was exhausting.

I was constantly cleaning up the messes I made in my relationships or just walking away from them. Many bridges have been burned and many have been blown up.

I don’t ever wish to go back again in my past. I don’t look back anymore. Instead, I continuously ask the Higher Holy Spirit Self to help me harvest all the wisdom from my experiences.

What I learned is that I was constantly repeating my same upsets and errors because I was holding grudges. Holding grievances prevented me from learning from my experiences because I always thought I knew what everything was for.

When I learned to forgive, to give up my meaning for everything, then I could discover what things were really for, and harvest the wisdom they brought me. Eureka! It was a way out of hell!

The most amazing thing I’ve ever learned is that true forgiveness heals deeply. True forgiveness heals long held mental and emotional patterns in a miraculous way.

A Course in Miracles promises us that the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of our wrong decisions if we allow it. The thing is, most people feel so guilty, and believe that they should be punished, and so they won’t allow the consequences to be undone. Yet, no matter how long we’ve lived in that mindset, we can shift in an instant. We can get out of hell.

I’m so glad I figured out how to ALLOW all the consequences to be undone and to rescue my relationships.

I know this is a repetitive theme of mine, but I feel I absolutely have to keep sharing what is so precious to me – and that’s the realization that when we hold the highest and best for our relationships that’s exactly what comes to pass.

I’ve been a spiritual counselor since 2000. That’s 18 years of counseling individuals and couples. I’ve been teaching classes and leading retreats for 21 years. In all this time, with all of these people, almost everyone I’ve ever worked with was experiencing some kind of relationship upset that was rocking them to their core.

ACIM tells us that relationships are the #1 tool we have to heal our mind and wake up. Let’s do exactly that starting NOW.

Like me, many people have been so completely brought to their knees or flat on their face in the manure by their inability to maintain relationship harmony – and the meaning they make of it. This need not be.

Forgiveness is a miracle tool. It’s not magic. It’s miraculously healing, and that’s an entirely different thing from a temporary magic fix.

Miraculous healing lasts.

It’s permanent healing because it’s at the level of the mind – not the level of the personality.

This isn’t behavior modification or anger management – it’s true and lasting healing.

This isn’t self-improvement, because we don’t need improvement – we only need to let go of that which is false.

Hey, I still get annoyed on a regular basis.
I don’t get angry like I used to AT ALL anymore.
I don’t ever go to the place of thinking that there’s something wrong with me.
That’s completely over.
And that’s what I am holding for everyone.

As a counselor, I’ve worked with people who’ve felt way beyond any kind of hope, and they have been transformed by the healing of their mind.

They had to be willing.
They had to ALLOW the healing to take place, to call it forth, accept it and receive it. It’s not magic. It takes real willingness. It’s not a passive thing. It’s active willingness.

We cannot hold onto complaints and expect miracles.
We cannot hold onto grievances and also energize the highest and best.
We have to choose which way to go.
We can learn through pain or we can learn through miracles and Joy.

The holidays are coming.
It’s a time when we can either re-energize the old hurts, disappointments, regrets, guilt, blame, and shame – or we can decide to be a healing presence in our relationships.

We can repeat the past or we can call forth a renewal and restoration.
It’s our choice.

I’ve been teaching forgiveness for 20 years and it’s been a great learning to me. I continue to be AMAZED at how forgiveness transforms EVERYTHING, including our physical pains.

I don’t consider myself a healer, but I do feel that I’m a healing presence. Where I once was utterly convinced that I was a really bad person, I now know that there are no bad people. We’re all good and beautiful people who can sometimes get convinced that we’re bad and then act that way.

When someone feels unlovable they don’t have much to lose, but what little they do have they can’t afford to lose. They will defend themselves through attacking. Think of a wounded dog that’s been so hurt it doesn’t trust anyone.

When we can’t trust ourselves to be loving or kind, even when it’s really important to keep from ruining our relationships, then we can feel completely unworthy of Love. We’re not, but that’s how we feel.

Forgiveness is the only thing I know of that heals back to the root cause of things. When we ALLOW the healing back to the root cause, whatever that might be, in this life or any other, then we’re free forever! That recalibrates our whole life.

Now is the time to make a commitment to forgive EVERYTHING and let our ability to fully give and receive Love be restored to us.

No matter what we’ve done, no matter what has been done to us, we can be restored at the level of the mind. From the mind, it will ripple into all of our relationships and experiences, even into every cell, fiber and function of our physical, and emotional bodies as well.

Let’s get active with the forgiveness.
Let’s become experts at it.
Let’s deeply commit to truly heal by allowing the Holy Spirit to undo all the consequences of our wrong decisions – even the ones we don’t recall. The Holy Spirit can heal it all.

In my classes, I invite people to PROVE that God works. That way they KNOW, they really know.

Doing this work now, we can have completely different experiences this holiday season. Let’s get out in front of this.

We don’t have to carry the past into the new year. We can put our attention on the things that cultivate joyful, happy learning and living.

In ACIM, Jesus tells us forgiveness is the #1 tool for our awakening, for healing, for liberation. Let’s believe him. We can prove that forgiveness is liberating and then we’re modeling it for everyone.

I’m choosing liberation. How about you?

Any healing we do for ourselves, we do for everyone.

Let’s take the lead this fall and get ALL of our forgiveness done.

If you’d like to join with me, consider my Finding Freedom From Fear Spiritual Bootcamp with ACIM Principles. We begin tomorrow, Monday, October 12th and our focus is on forgiveness in order to eliminate fear and the patterns of fear.

Trust your intuition! If it’s right for you right now, you’ll know.

If you’re SO ready to have a major healing in your relationships, you might like my Finding Freedom From Fear, spiritual Bootcamp class with ACIM principles. We start tomorrow Monday, October 12th.

Join me and you’ll be able to close out this year feeling like you had one of the best years ever! This is your chance, if you’d like to join me and GO FOR IT!

If you’ve been thinking about doing my Finding Freedom From Fear Bootcamp for a while, but just haven’t been ready, consider booking an exploratory call with one of the spiritual counselors. They can answer all your questions and you’ll know what’s best for you.

Book an exploratory call today!

My Finding Freedom From Fear spiritual bootcamp isn’t for everyone – it’s for those who are willing to dive in and do the work to free their mind – and have fun doing it! Click here now to learn more.

TODAY, you can join me and my dear friend, Karen Russo as our speaker and Omiyomi Ibuemi is back with her music. We’re coming together to share our inspiration in many ways. We’ll have a spiritual celebration together with message and music – we call it Sundays With Spirit. Please invite your family! If you can’t join us, you can catch the replay! Because we’re going to be live on video, you’ll have to register to get the details. All are welcome, there’s no charge, but you do have to register unless you’ve already registered in the past.

When you register, you’ll also get easy access to past services with Jon Mundy, Lisa Natoli, David Hoffmeister, Maureen Muldoon, Corinne Zupko, Maria Felipe, Frances Xu, Jimmy Twyman and more. If you’ve already registered for a previous Sunday – you don’t need to register again, you’ll get a reminder with the details automatically.

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Mask or No Mask

Monday, September 28th, 2020

I’ve had a number of people ask me if folks are wearing masks in Vermont. First of all, I have a very limited exposure to other people here. I see a few friends locally and we’re not always wearing masks because we’re not dealing with people who aren’t from the neighborhood. There’s no virus right around here.

Second, when I do venture out, it’s to the grocery store or to pick up take-out locally. I’m in a very rural area of Vermont. There aren’t a lot of people in the grocery store. Take-out pick up is usually outside. Almost everyone in town, even though it is a TINY town, is wearing a mask walking on the street, or at least as soon as they get close enough, they put on a mask,

Lincoln, Vermont, the town I live in, has a tiny general store and that’s it. Lincoln is 44 square miles with a population of 1,250. A square mile is 640 acres. That’s 22.5 acres per person. To put it in perspective, Washington, D.C. is 68 square miles with a population of 705,000. That’s 0,06 acres per person. We’ve got lots of room for social distancing.

Bristol, the next town over has 3,800 people and has a couple of restaurants and a modest chain grocery store, and a Walgreens. The next nearest decent grocery store is at least 30 mins from my house. We’re out in country, on the edge of a huge national forest, in the mountains.

Right now, we’re experiencing a drought. Every day someone new on the road (it’s a dirt road, btw) has had their well run dry. We’ve had hardly any rain all summer. Our well at the house here has run dry. It’s challenging, but no one is complaining as things are much worse for people elsewhere. We have no fires. We know rain will come. In fact, I just learned it’ll be coming this week.

Back to the masks.

People wear masks in stores and public places here because they care about their neighbors.

In a rural community like this people help each other. If someone is sick, neighbors take food, they cut wood, they shovel snow, they go to the store for them. When you have excess squash in the garden, you distribute it to neighbors. You care and you share.

In this environment, to not wear a mask would be to say that you don’t care about your neighbors and community. It’s that simple.

I understand the politics of masks, and, in this neck of the woods, it’s just common courtesy to wear a mask.

It’s a sign that you care about more than yourself – and politics.

I’m not saying it’s right or wrong to wear a mask – I’m only sharing what I feel is happening here in this community in rural Vermont because so many people have asked me.

Almost every time I go to the grocery store I have a little dance I do. I put on my lip balm, I get out of my car and walk to the store, then I realize I forgot my mask, I turn around and go back to my car. I wipe off the lip balm so I don’t smear it on the mask and I put on my mask and walk back to the store. I’m just now getting to the point where I remember to bring a mask.

This won’t last forever, but it is what’s happening right now. I’m not afraid of the virus. I’m not afraid, because there’s nothing for me to fear.

I do care that people know that I care and so I wear a mask.

JOIN US! I’m inviting you to join me and others in my 40 Day Kirtan Kriya Meditation Challenge. Let’s make it fun together!

There’s no cost to join our meditation challenge – this is just a gift from the Power of Love Ministry to you.

Click here to learn more about the Kirtan Kriya 40 Day Meditation Challenge!

It’s my joy to share this spiritual practice that supports us in so many ways.

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Vision of Relationship Healing

Tuesday, July 21st, 2020

In every relationship, there’s a vision of holiness that can be revealed.

When we give up on other people, we’re also giving up on ourselves.  And yet, when people are so disappointing and difficult, it’s so tempting to walk away from them.  Giving up, quitting, that’s the easy thing to do, in the short run.  In the long run, it will become a weight that’s not worth carrying.

So, what to do?  I get this question a lot.  

Consider this:  We’re all one with each other.  And, we’re all eternal.  Therefore, it stands to reason that our relationships are eternal as well.  So, while we can certainly SEEM to walk away and end a relationship in this lifetime, it’s only temporary.

Why settle for a temporary solution that will only make things more challenging in the future?  Why build into your future a challenge you’ll have to deal with that will be fermenting the entire time between now and then?

How to deal with it in the present moment?  Well, you don’t have to keep talking with the person.  You don’t have to connect and relate with them in the visible world.  Seek not to change another person, but to change your mind about them.

Not many people are really willing to hold the vision of the highest and best in their difficult relationships.  It takes a lot more effort than it does to complain.  

Complaining never helps.  Complaining makes you a crap magnet.  Compassion makes you a LOVE magnet.  Which would you rather be.

Hold the vision of a healed relationships and then let Spirit do the healing.  Sometimes this can be REALLY challenging.  And, it’s also a way to heal your mind.  

If you give up on the relationship, you’re giving up on yourself.

Instead of giving up on the relationship, give the relationship UP to the Higher Holy Spirit Self.

Give up your needing, wanting, cravings and aversions about the relationship.  Give up all forms of attachment to the person and the way the relationship “should” be and you’ll have a healing in your heart – but you have to really mean it.

Be willing to hold a vision of healing without an attachment to how it looks.

Focus on how you’d like that relationship to feel – would you like it to feel loving, harmonious, playful, respectful, prosperous, beautiful and more?  Hold the vision of that, cultivate that feeling and give up how you think it should look.

It may take a great willingness, and it may take a while, but then it won’t come back and bite you on the behind and that’s great!  We have other things to do besides recovering from being bitten on the behind!  

If you were freaking out, or in a rough place, would you wish for SOMEONE to hold the high watch for you?  Of course you would.  Be that person now!

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The Strongest Hearts

Friday, April 17th, 2020

Peace to you, my friend! I’ve been in quarantine by myself now for over a month. I have much more work than normal offering extra support during this time and strengthening our community with additional offerings. I have no complaints.

In breaks, I like to catch up a bit while cooking and I watch youtube videos of the late-night hosts doing their shows from their homes. They have a lot of jokes about how they’ve seen everything on Netflix and are bored.

I get it. They’re used to commuting and having meetings all day long and getting dressed in hair and make-up, having rehearsals and all kinds of activities that they don’t have while doing the show from home.

Spiritual students who have the luxury to quarantine at home or who are forced to quarantine, have been laid off or fired due to the virus are having a different experience.

This is the time that we were born for and have been preparing for our entire lives. This is a time when we can do more spiritual practice and focus on being truly helpful in our community.

Now, more than ever, our brothers and sisters are turning to us for support.

It’s time for us to strengthen our hearts.

I was sharing in class yesterday that, at the beginning of this pandemic, I was watching an hour or so of news a day, while cooking and doing things around the house. I was learning about the whole virus situation, just like everyone else.

Now, I don’t feel a need to focus on virus news. I can read a few tweets, check the headlines in a few papers and that’ll do me.

My job is to be at Peace, and to know that, despite ALL appearances, everything is working together for our good. More people are becoming more compassionate than ever. They’re opening their hearts to those who are in service, and those who have lost loved ones.

Just think, each day in NYC, at 7pm, the entire city applauds their health care workers and those in service to help them get through this incredibly difficult time. I lived in New York for 10 years and people used to say that New Yorkers are tough, and they are. They are resilient. They are strong and they are also loving and appreciative.

The toughest people on earth are the ones with the biggest hearts. Or so it seems to me.

One of the things that helps us navigate this intensity is to be able to feel our feelings and let them pass on through. Rather than deny them or subvert them, we can learn to feel our feelings. That does take strength and courage. It also builds strength, courage and compassion that we can share with others.

When we have the capacity to honor our own feelings without drowning in them, then we can support others who are going through a tough time and not fear their emotional outbursts.

Many people are grieving now, and suddenly. There is the obvious grief for the loss of life, but many are grieving the loss of their lifestyle, their job, their plans for the future and a myriad of things that they’d thought would be theirs.

Think of the weddings delayed.
Think of the families with new babies that no one can come visit.

Having offered grief support to many people for decades, one thing I know is that many, MANY people don’t know how to handle grief, and they definitely aren’t very good at handling the grief of other people.

Many of the folks I’ve talked to have been intensely wounded by the thoughtless things people have said to them. People don’t have an intention to be unkind or disrespectful, they just don’t understand what the grieving person is going through.

One of the most intense things I’ve ever heard said to someone grieving was said to an 84 year old woman who had recently lost her husband of more than 60 years. After only a few months into her widowhood, some of her closest friends were telling her she had to “get over it.” I was shocked.

Of course, this woman’s friends didn’t wish to hurt her feelings or disrespect her. Not at all, they just wanted her to be happy again and move on.

When our loved ones pass away, we aren’t going to get over it.

And we’re not going to move on.

Those things aren’t ever going to happen.
They are unrealistic expectations.

When someone loses a child, a parent or a spouse, a dear friend, even a beloved dog, please don’t ever say anything about getting over it or moving on.

To the person who is grieving, it’s worse than saying to someone who just had both their arms amputated, “you have to get over it.” They’re not going to EVER get over it. What they WILL do is learn to live with it, but until that day comes, they’re going to grieve and that will include being in denial, being angry, and feeling like they wish they could just die too. These feelings are normal.

Even our most extreme feelings are often perfectly normal.

Please don’t tell people to get over it or move on.

And, when people tell YOU those things, just bless them. You may want to smack them or shake them, but they don’t know what they’re talking about. They are ignorant. Not stupid, just ignorant.

If they knew what they were talking about they would just be quiet, and say something like, “I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. This must be so hard for you. That is so rough. I don’t know how you can handle it.”

You really don’t need to say any more than that.

Sometimes it can be helpful to say, “I know you’ll get through this. It’s very intense, and I’m here to support you.” But no one really NEEDS to hear that.

Initially, it’s not a good idea to ask people how you can help them. I know that seems counter intuitive. But if they have to figure out how you can help them it just becomes more work for them. If you ask them how you can help, now they have one more thing to do. Now they have to help YOU.

Instead, just start helping.
That’s why people bring food.

Bring food that can be put in the freezer.
Cut their lawn.
Walk their dog.
Take out their trash, bring their cans to the curb, put them back.
Water the lawn.
Clean the kitchen.
Do the laundry.

Offer to wash their car, gas up their car, drive them places and don’t take no for an answer.

Do whatever you can do. Take care of their recycling.

Just do stuff. Everyone can use help. Especially now.

And let’s remember that our hearts, like our bones, can actually be stronger for having gone through the challenges.

We live to Love another day and with more compassion than ever.

I like to celebrate Spirit with friends and so this Sunday I’m starting live-stream Sunday services – open to all. Join me, Lisa Natoli, Jimmy Twyman and more friends. We’ll have a spiritual celebration together and if you can’t join us, you can catch the replay! Because we’re going to be live on video, you’ll have to register to get the details. All are welcome, there’s no charge.

Every day, part of my spiritual practice is to write inspiration and record a prayer to go with it. You can join me in cultivating the willingness that raises us ALL up so we can be truly helpful in this world. Please share my daily prayer with anyone who would find it helpful.

If you’d like extra support, you can subscribe to “My Daily Shot of Spiritual Espresso” if you haven’t already.

You can also get the podcast of my daily prayers and/or find them at YouTube.

Having trouble sleeping?

There are more than 444 episodes of my radio show on podcast. And some people listen to me as they fall asleep. I don’t take it personally when folks tell me I put them to sleep. I’m glad my voice can be soothing. You can subscribe to my podcast and have that as a resource. Maybe I can help you fall asleep.

All of this is free.

I look forward to our Sunday gathering. It means so much that we can join together and love on each other!

May you and your family feel blessed today and every day!

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Harmonious Relationships

Saturday, March 7th, 2020

February is relationship month for my podcast. Our relationships remind us to love, and they also inspire Love with in us. Love is our great healer.

Relationship is a profound and intensely challenging route to healing the mind. Releasing the attachments of romantic relationship or any kind of relationship can be one of the most difficult thing we do, and it also can bring the greatest benefit.

Let us all learn to trust Love, release all attachments, and remember to LAUGH!

Here’s some inspiration – a favorite passage of mine on Love:

Love by Emmet Fox
There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer;

No disease that enough love will not heal;
No door that enough love will not open;
No gulf that enough love will not bridge;
No wall that enough love will not throw down;
No sin that enough love will not redeem…
It makes no difference how deeply seated may be the trouble;
How hopeless the outlook;
How muddled the tangle;
How great the mistake;
A sufficient realization of love will dissolve it all…

If only you could love enough, you would be the happiest and most powerful being in the world.

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Friends & Blessings

Sunday, February 23rd, 2020

Like attracts like and that’s for sure. We also attract people who are sent to us so we can respond to their cry for Love. That’s the story of our relationships. I feel so blessed this weekend that I’ve been able to gather with like-minded friends in NYC to celebrate Jimmy Twyman and Bill Free as they finish up their St. Francis journey across the U.S.A. In case you don’t know, Jimmy has been sharing a one-man musical he’s written to share the life of St. Francis.

Yesterday we had a gathering of friends Jimmy, Bill, Lisa Natoli, Corinne Zupko, David Fishman, Jon Mundy and others, including a few from Masterful Living!

It was such a treat to have hours to hang out and talk together, to have dinner, coffee, dessert, and to see Jimmy’s inspiring show. Last show is tonight at The Church in the West Village, 7th Ave and 13th S at 6:30. Come and have some delicious soup!

Of course, we had a coffee crew for our spiritual espresso!

Vickie Poppe and Jon Mundy were serving delicious food to the homeless who attended last night. The joining together is so enriching, nourishing and inspiring. Always. It’s never dull or not worth the time, energy and effort.

This is why I do my retreats and workshops. It’s why I’m a teacher and Spiritual Counselor. The two or more gathering is so healing.

Yes, we do need time alone with Spirit, but we also need to be the two or more gathered in Christ’s name with a strong intention to heal.

What could bring more benefit to this world then our healed mind? We heal more and help more when we gather! I’m going to be offering an online retreat for those who are recovering from sexual abuse – hold the weekend dates – first weekend in April, Friday to Sunday – all day, online, for our healing! Save those dates if you’d like to join us!

Let’s pray to let Spirit lead us and guide us!

Prayer is so powerful. Please join me in my daily Prayer for Today – today’s prayer is for Living with Christ in Mind. You can click and listen now. We use technology to transcend time and space and deepen our spiritual practice. And that’s beautiful!

Spirit is always for us and never against us, and we can learn to rely upon that. And when we do, we feel carried and lifted to much higher ground.

Like, MLK, we can start to see and feel the promised land and recognize that it is within us. It has been there all along!

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Generous of Spirit

Friday, February 21st, 2020

I used to be an over-giver and I would give to depletion. I saw it all around me in the spiritual community, and the model of the over-giver was that “This is what being super spiritual looks like.” It took me some time, but I realized that this over-giving isn’t healthy and it’s actually affirming the ego thought system of our unworthiness.

No one over-gives who feels good about themselves. That’s a learned behavior that we can let go of.

The easiest way I found was to focus on being generous of spirit.

I put my focus on giving from the heart.

A Course in Miracles tells us “To have, give all to all.” And that’s a great plan.

We over-give because we’re trying to get something in return. We’re looking to GET some sense of feeling full instead of living with the deep fulfillment of living a balanced life.

In my classes, I talk about giving and receiving because that’s such a fundamental aspect of life. Yet, how many of us were consciously taught about giving and receiving? It doesn’t seem like there are very many who really are conscious about giving and receiving.

For spiritual students, they’ve heard that giving is better than receiving, but I am grateful to report that it can’t possibly be true.

The only place there is to receive from is Spirit.

So, in some ways, it’s more vital to be able to receive well from Spirit.

Without that, we won’t have ANYTHING to give that’s worth having.

I had a number of years where I really focused on shifting my ability to receive from Spirit in terms of direct insight, but also from Spirit in what people were sharing with me.

Let’s live without limits. Limits are artificial, and imposed by the ego thought system of separation. We don’t need them and we can live without them. Let’s do it. Are you with me?

In the comments below, I invite you to share a way that you over-give that you might be willing to let go of so that Spirit can flow in more fully! Thank you!

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Don’t Walk Away

Wednesday, February 19th, 2020

When people bother us and when our relationships are challenging and difficult, the temptation is to walk away, to get out and to shut the door. It can be very tempting. Many times I see people who feel threatened when a relationship is in jeopardy actually push the other person away so intently and so persistently that the other person gets the message they’re not wanted anymore, when nothing could be further from the truth. Many of us can be neurotic and operating inside the neurosis, but not even realize what’s going on. When people push others away precisely because they fear losing them, this is a hard way to learn. I’ve done it. Maybe you have, too. Feeling insecure and vulnerable can be so upsetting that we’ll take on an angry, tough stance in order to feel strong, but it doesn’t work. Only living from our loving heart brings strength. I used to be a bridge-burner.

I didn’t care if I burned the bridges in my relationships, because I was NEVER going back to where I felt vulnerable and insecure.

Why would I? Or, so I thought. Now, I’m not interested in burning any bridges.

I’m interested in cultivating relationships to last a lifetime and beyond.

And I have to accept that not everyone feels this way, and that’s temporary. It’s temporary because we’re all eternally One with each other, and that’s an inescapable fact.

We’ll always be in a relationship at the level of the mind.

So, why not make it also a successful and healing relationship, too?

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Relationship Healing

Tuesday, February 18th, 2020

I’m beyond grateful for the healing I’ve had in my relationships. It has taught me so much.

A Course in Miracles tells us that relationships are the #1 tool we have to heal our mind of all of our misperceptions.

And yet, most of us persist in continuing to blame others for our upsets and, in doing so, we miss the opportunity for healing that’s presenting itself.

I got so tired of the repeating patterns in my relationships, I just couldn’t stand it anymore.

Every time I got triggered I got upset to my core, and it was too much for me. I prayed and prayed and prayed for relief.

My relief came in the form of my realizing that I was responsible for what I saw, and I was choosing the upset that I wished to feel. It took me a while to figure it out, but once I was willing to take responsibility the rest was relatively easy.

“This is the only thing that you need do for vision, happiness, release from pain and the complete escape from sin, all to be given you. Say only this, but mean it with no reservations, for here the power of salvation lies:

I am responsible for what I see. I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide upon the goal I would achieve. And everything that seems to happen to me I ask for, and receive as I have asked. Deceive yourself no longer that you are helpless in the face of what is done to you. Acknowledge but that you have been mistaken, and all effects of your mistakes will disappear.” T-21.II.2.

Practicing this in our relationships is profoundly transformative.

It’s not for the lazy or faint of heart. It will rock you to your core, but in a way that’s healing and so helpful. It does require a tremendous willingness, an earnest willingness and a relentless willingness.

Ask yourself if you have that kind of willingness?

“Wilt though be made whole?”

If you don’t have the willingness, what are you waiting for?
Why do you delay?

Do you believe you’re helpless and hopeless?

If so, then you’re not relying upon the Higher Holy Spirit Self for healing, you’re relying upon ego and that’s the reason.

It’s not that you can’t heal, it’s that you won’t choose to believe it.

That can change, too, if you’re willing.

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Healing Relationship Fear Triggers

Tuesday, February 4th, 2020

We’re in February now, and this is the month that I devote all the episodes of my podcast to relationships. My topic today is “Healing the Relationship Fear Triggers” and it’s such a good one! (By the way, you can easily search in the archive of my podcast for episodes on relationship – there are SO many.)

Getting triggered in relationship is normal, and it’s pretty constant for most people.

Each one of these triggers is a point where we could choose permanent and lasting healing – or we can repeat the same patterns and have more of the same experience.

When we get triggered, this is the time to choose again and choose something different. After all, we’re never upset for the reason we think and, in truth, we really don’t know what anything is for. These are the most helpful teachings of A Course in Miracles.

One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves and share with others is the ability to be calm and have patience. This doesn’t mean denying how we feel. We can learn to feel our feelings without exploding and without dumping them all over people, AND without stuffing them.

Once I realized that each and every upset COULD be a point of healing if I ALLOWED it to be, I started to approach my life in an entirely different way. I made healing a priority. I made Peace, calm and patience a priority.

It does take a real willingness, and it does take courage to break from the habits of the past. We have knee-jerk reactions because we haven’t healed the underlying beliefs.

Our work isn’t behavior modification. Let’s not settle for that. We’re going for a healing of the root cause, whatever it is, so that we can be completely free of the triggers forever.

If we settle for behavior modification, we’re giving up on the profound healing that’s available to us. When we settle, we’re not in that Partnership with the Higher Holy Spirit Self.

When we feel connected to Spirit, then we can have the courage to heal. We can put Spirit in charge.

I used to get SO triggered and I’d say the meanest things.
I used to shut people out and punish them for triggering me.
I used to attack people and then feel ashamed.

These patterns are THICK, they are intense – AND they can dissolve and resolve so easily when we trust Spirit to heal them.

It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. We can have healing in all of the consequences of our wrong decisions, and the wrong decisions of others. It’s a great investment of our trust and faith. When we really trust, we have real results.

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Going “ALL-IN”

Monday, December 30th, 2019

Now is the time for us to decide what kind of year we’d like to have.

I’ve learned the power of decision. And it’s so powerful when we begin a new year with a clear decision of what our year is going to be about. I was sharing yesterday that I remember one year I decided to stop working for money and to begin working only for Love. It was a real turning point for me. My life changed in a major way then.

Let 2020 be the year that you are ALL-IN for Love!

Making the decision to be ALL-IN may feel daunting, impossible and too challenging, but we can shift that perspective so that we can actually choose to go for it.

For me, being ALL-IN means that I’m truly doing the best I can at each moment to choose Love.

Sometimes I fall short, but then I have the opportunity to start all over again, and I begin by choosing not to judge myself for having been less than loving only a moment ago.

Being ALL-IN doesn’t mean getting it “perfect” in each moment, it means holding the intention to be loving and choosing Love as much as possible. I used to think that it would be so hard, but it’s actually far easier than having a lot of worries, doubt, and fear.

It took me quite a while to recognize that every time I choose to judge and to attack, no matter how subtle it might seem, I will feel that attack thought boomerang back to me in the form of my own self-doubt and fear.

The less judgment I have, the more peaceful I am.

The more I choose to give up my attachments to my judgments, my beliefs, and the need to be right, the less fear and worry I experience and the more Joy I feel.

Now, I’m trying to remember why I was so dang interested in being right – it didn’t make me happy. Being loving is what makes me happy.

2020 is the year that I’m choosing to double down on my commitment to be ALL-IN for Love.

Care to join me? Let’s go for it!

Learning to hold a healing vision is just one of the things we learn in my yearlong Masterful Living Course. We actively practice healing the deep sense of unworthiness that most spiritual students suffer from.  If you feel called, come join us in 2020 for the best year of your life – the year that changes EVERYTHING, if you’re willing.  Let’s do it together.  If you’d like to find out what others are saying about this powerful community please click here to learn more now.

Bonus classes start on January 1st.

If this is right for you, you WILL know it.

Our first BONUS class is New Year’s Reboot on January 1, but anyone can join us.  Let’s reboot into this new year and truly experience the sense of newness!

Our second BONUS is my End My Self-Sabotage 6 Day challenge on January 2nd. The first 2 days are my gift to you and open to everyone. For everyone in Masterful Living, it’s a BONUS class.

Are you unsure about whether my yearlong Masterful Living 2020 is right for you right now? You can book an Exploratory Call with one of the Spiritual Counselors and let them answer all your questions. Click here now to book an Exploratory Call. If you’re going to join us next year in the Masterful Living Course 2020, I encourage you to register early. Make the commitment to yourself NOW and you’ll have so much to look forward to – including tremendous healing and transformation! Give yourself this gift and you’ll be amazed at how your connection with Spirit will bloom!

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Real Willingness

Wednesday, December 4th, 2019

It’s exciting! In Masterful Living this week we’ve been talking about how we’ve had breakthroughs with our families over the holidays. Well, that’s not quite accurate. We’ve had breakthroughs in our thinking this year, and that’s led to the shifts and changes we’re seeing in our lives, in our families, in our bodies, and our finances.

What we’ve been talking about this week is that we can see that, because we have changed our energy, our vibration, our thinking and beliefs, the people around us are making different choices. It’s absolute proof that our choices make a BIG difference in the lives of others because our minds are joined.

This is powerful stuff!

SO MANY people I’ve spoken to in Masterful Living over the last 11 years have told me that they never thought it would work for them. They believed these spiritual practices and the healing they bring would work for others but not for them. And yet, if they’re willing, it does work for them. Because Spirit never fails.

When we put Spirit in charge, we can succeed.

Many times we think we have to change other people’s minds and make them understand something so that they’ll shift and change, but that’s not how it works. When we can hold folks in our lives with the higher and best thoughts, and then be the living demonstration of Peace, of Love, they will have healing, too.

A Course in Miracles says it this way: Seek not to change the world, but choose to change your mind about the world.

It takes ACTUAL willingness to actively choose change your mind about the world.

Many people SAY they’re willing, but when the moment comes for them to demonstrate their willingness they don’t even realize it. They’re not THAT interested in changing their mind and so they miss the opportunity. That was me.

We can say we’re willing, but that’s not willingness.

I so admire the beautiful folks who join us in Masterful Living. They are the living demonstrations of willingness and their lives demonstrate their actual willingness.

To experience miracles we must be miracle-minded.
To be miracle-minded, we must be willing to choose differently.
Willingness is not words, it’s choices.
Never forget that and you’ll see the difference in your life.
We are real people experiencing real miracles.

How was your Thanksgiving?
Did you see miraculous shifts and changes in your family, and relations?
Please share in the comments below and let me know!

Would you like to learn to have real trust and faith in the Spirit? If you feel inspired to join me, we’ll do it together! My “Undoing Unworthiness” class is this week, and the Masterful Living Course 2020 starts with a bonus class in 30 days on January 1st. It’s one of my favorite classes all year!

28 Days to January 1st – I share what I learned that shifted me out of my habits of spinning around in the same repeating upsets in my Masterful Living Course 2020. Registration is open NOW. I encourage you to commit now so that you have that to look forward to. At no charge, you can also book an Exploratory Call to speak with one of the Spiritual Counselors who has already done the program and they can help you be clear if this is right for you right now.

Click here now to book a free Exploratory Call about Masterful Living 2020.

NEW Class THIS WEEK: Undoing Unworthiness! Stop Self-Attack NOW! A belief in unworthiness and a habit of self-attack undermines your happiness every moment of every day.

With the work we’ll do in this class, you can end your year feeling spiritually successful and start your new year ready to have the best year ever. This is the perfect time to do this. Click here now to learn more.

A 3-part live video online class to support you in having a breakthrough and learning the REAL benefits of life when you feel worthy of Love, Abundance and ALL the good life has to offer.

What could be more important than your happiness?

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Outsider – When You Feel Like You Don’t Belong

Tuesday, December 3rd, 2019

You might be surprised to learn that most spiritual students feel like an outsider. Think of it: all these people who are connected in spiritual community and yet they still feel like an outsider.

At the A Course in Miracles conference this year in Boston, I offered an afternoon workshop about starting a Study Group that was SO powerful. Many there shared that they really desired to start an ACIM Study Group, but they were afraid for people they knew to know what they were up to. In that experience, in that life, there’s a sense of not belonging and being different. It’s a projection of our sense of separation.

For a long time I felt that I didn’t belong in so many different ways.

I remember when I was a kid that I started school earlier than some – my birthday is at the end of November, and so I started school early – and I wasn’t really as mature as the other kids. I’m not complaining, but I do sense that I felt different.

Then, as I got older, there was talk of me skipping a grade but my parents didn’t do it because I was already younger than others in the class. The reason for me skipping a grade is that they knew I was bored. The compromise was for me to do extra book reports.

I know that in junior high school I was really beginning to feel like I didn’t fit in, but I managed to find my crowd of misfits to feel comfortable enough. In high school I was with a different group of misfits, and at least we were all misfits and so that made us fit together.

For my teens and twenties, I particularly felt that I didn’t belong but I made the best of it. The main thing I felt was that I didn’t belong on this Earth. As my mind began to clear as a result of my spiritual practice, I went through another period of feeling that I just didn’t fit into this existence – that there was another dimension where I was supposed to be and where I’d feel comfortable.

There are many of us who are here to help lead humanity into the next Golden Age of Enlightenment. We’re in this in-between the ages stage. The Piscean Age isn’t quite finished and the Aquarian Age is just getting started. We’re here to help be the bridge to the Golden Age of Enlightenment.

Think of a bridge – it is a structure between two places – and that’s what we are – a bridge between worlds.

I also had NO idea that support was the key to friendship.

So, let’s have it be okay that we don’t belong to the ego structures of this world – we belong to Spirit. We belong to the Light and that’s an absolutely wonderful thing to realize!

Do you feel like you don’t belong? Please share in the comments below and let me know!

Would you like to learn to have real trust and faith in the Spirit? If you feel inspired to join me, we’ll do it together! My “Undoing Unworthiness” class is this week, and the Masterful Living Course 2020 starts with a bonus class in 30 days on January 1st. It’s one of my favorite classes all year!

29 Days to January 1st – I share what I learned that shifted me out of my habits of spinning around in the same repeating upsets in my Masterful Living Course 2020. Registration is open NOW. I encourage you to commit now so that you have that to look forward to. At no charge, you can also book an Exploratory Call to speak with one of the Spiritual Counselors who has already done the program and they can help you be clear if this is right for you right now.

Click here now to book a free Exploratory Call about Masterful Living 2020.

NEW Class THIS WEEK: Undoing Unworthiness! Stop Self-Attack NOW! A belief in unworthiness and a habit of self-attack undermines your happiness every moment of every day.

With the work we’ll do in this class, you can end your year feeling spiritually successful and start your new year ready to have the best year ever. This is the perfect time to do this. Click here now to learn more.

A 3-part live video online class to support you in having a breakthrough and learning the REAL benefits of life when you feel worthy of Love, Abundance and ALL the good life has to offer.

What could be more important than your happiness?

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Holy Friendships

Monday, December 2nd, 2019

I’ve been blessed to share my birthday and Thanksgiving with some very dear friends I’ve known for decades and we have a good time together! There’s no fighting, no annoyances, no problems, only the pleasure of each other’s company.

What’s the secret to our friendship success?

We support each other. We actively love and support each other.

There’s no competition because there’s only love and support.

There’s no criticism because we’re focused on Love and support.It doesn’t matter that we don’t 100% agree on everything.

I used to have friends that I felt obligated to be with and to stay in touch with. I don’t have those kinds of friendships anymore. I used to organize my friendships by a set of ideas that I thought were what I should do instead of what I felt like doing.

I’m so glad I got the ego out of my friendships and put Spirit in charge!

We can have holy relationships in all of our relationships if we’re willing. I only wish that someone had told me that a very long time ago!

I also had NO idea that support was the key to friendship.

I really used to think it was more about spending time together and shared interests, but it doesn’t have to be that at all.

Another aspect of successful friendship is being able to RECEIVE support. And that does involve trust.

In my Masterful Living Course, I have the great privilege of meeting 1-on-1 with the participants, and the majority of them tell me that trust is a major issue. Anyone who has studied A Course in Miracles knows that trust is the number one characteristic of God’s Teachers. Trust is required. Trust builds faith.

It’s not so much that we trust each other – we trust Spirit IN each other.

When we decide to love and cherish the people in our lives, then the holy relationship emerges and that’s healing to everyone, most particularly those in that relationship and others nearby. Each holy relationship is a demonstration of God’s Love, and that’s healing to us all.

When we request the holy relationship, the Higher Holy Spirit Self will provide the means for us to attain it and only our willingness to BE in it is required. We cannot have a holy relationship without a willingness to offer Love and support, and life with relationships in which we’re not willing to give and receive Love and support is a life of suffering.

Being in the flow of Love and support is what we’re designed for.We are designed to be the perfect givers and receivers of Love, and that’s what friends are for.

Would you like to learn to have real trust and faith in the Spirit? If you feel inspired to join me, we’ll do it together! My “Undoing Unworthiness” class is this week, and the Masterful Living Course 2020 starts with a bonus class in 30 days on January 1st. It’s one of my favorite classes all year!

30 Days to January 1st – I share what I learned that shifted me out of my habits of spinning around in the same repeating upsets in my Masterful Living Course 2020. Registration is open NOW. I encourage you to commit now so that you have that to look forward to. At no charge, you can also book an Exploratory Call to speak with one of the Spiritual Counselors who has already done the program and they can help you be clear if this is right for you right now.

Click here now to book a free Exploratory Call about Masterful Living 2020.

NEW Class THIS WEEK: Undoing Unworthiness! Stop Self-Attack NOW! A belief in unworthiness and a habit of self-attack undermines your happiness every moment of every day.

With the work we’ll do in this class, you can end your year feeling spiritually successful and start your new year ready to have the best year ever. This is the perfect time to do this. Click here now to learn more.

A 3-part live video online class to support you in having a breakthrough and learning the REAL benefits of life when you feel worthy of Love, Abundance and ALL the good life has to offer.

What could be more important than your happiness?

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Family Forgiveness & Relationship Healing

Sunday, November 10th, 2019

For me, the hardest thing to let go of was the thing I made. It was the image of myself as being less than lovable. It’s so crazy that, in this world, the things we cling to the very most are the things that are

A. Not true
B. Painful

How dang crazy is that?

Yet, I’ve seen there’s a method to the madness of it!

In A Course in Miracles, the Manual for Teachers it talks about the development of trust is a process we must all go through in order to release from suffering.

First, they must go through what might be called ‘a period of undoing.’ This need not be painful, but it usually is so experienced. It seems as if things are being taken away, and it is rarely understood initially that their lack of value is merely being recognized. How can lack of value be perceived unless the perceiver is in a position where he must see things in a different light?

One of the hardest things for me to give up was all the painful patterns in my family relationships and most intimate relationships – these were also the things that bothered me the most.

I loathed repeating the same arguments, but I couldn’t seem to stop it.
I despaired over the same hurts and upsets, but I didn’t know how to rise above it.
I was crushed and demoralized by the same meltdowns, again and again, but I was convinced it was all happening TO me instead of by me.

I wasn’t willing to make the changes necessary to have healing. I lived that way for a VERY long time.

And now that I’ve learned how forgiveness works to heal ALL of it, I have to share every day of my life because it’s so freakin’ valuable!

If we don’t give up the things that we’re using to hurt ourselves, it may seem as though they’re being taken away. Releasing attachment to the things that stand in the way of our happiness may seem like the thing we’d want the most, but it’s not. And that’s why working together with other like-minded souls makes it so much easier to for us to see the Wisdom of letting go of our attachments to false beliefs, false identities, and the story we’re telling ourselves.

If we’re willing to give up the false idols and false images that we’ve grown so attached to, then there is a healing, a transformation, and revelation that is not only liberating it’s thrilling! The thrill comes from being willing to trade all that we’ve treasured for something of real value – the ability to see our perfection and the perfection of all.

It’s a question of motivation.

Many of us spend a very long time avoiding the release of the attachments and the pain builds and builds until the pain is so great we’re willing to do ANYTHING to make a change – but it doesn’t have to be that way.

After counseling people for 19 years, I’ve seen that many people have a habit of being unhappy, and they are more comfortable in their unhappiness than they would be in doing something new.

Some people are afraid of being happy because they don’t trust it, and I understand that. In order to be happy and stay happy (most of the time), we must give up being a victim and that means giving up complaining, and criticizing, and taking offense.

Sometimes it’s our anger and upset that gives us a feeling aliveness and power. It’s all false. Of course, it is. But if all we know is what’s false, then we’re going to cling to it. And that’s where a strong spiritual practice helps to break through the habit of playing small, self-attack, and attachment to negative habits.

Sometimes negative pleasure is all we’ve got, so how can we give it up? Negative pleasure is the thing that seems pleasurable, but actually it puts us on the “Pain Train” with a one-way ticket.

Spiritual practice is the thing that releases us from all of this. Making a commitment to and EFFECTIVE spiritual practice is where many people fall short. Their belief is so strong that they’ll fail that they don’t even try.

Only the ego fails.
Spirit cannot fail – it’s not even possible.

When we put our faith in Spirit, we’re strong and we cannot go wrong.

We’re always putting our faith in something.
We can choose ego or Spirit.
Placing my faith in Spirit is the thing that brought me Peace.

At first, it did seem like a period of undoing, and it was. It was a period of undoing all the attachments I had to do things the ego way.

I wasn’t sure I would happier trusting Spirit, but I was willing to try. That willingness got me through the difficulties. It raised me up and kept me headed in a higher direction.

I am so grateful for realizing I’d been placing my faith in my own opinion and that I could change my mind. This realization was a great blessing and a gift! I finally quit making myself unhappy! Phew!

Do you see where you’re placing your faith and trust in your own beliefs and perceptions rather than in Love, in Spirit, in truth? Being aware of this is a great opportunity to go the other way and make a new choice.

Let’s allow the Higher Holy Spirit Self to undo all attachments we have to the habits of unhappiness and discover our true identity and live from that place!

ENOUGH already with the repeating pain patterns! Now is the time of our liberation!

If you’d like support for that I’m offering a forgiveness workshop to support anyone who is willing to do the work with me. You can register now, my gift to all, click now to join me: FREE forgiveness class TODAY LIVE ONLINE video All are welcome!

Let me suggest some simple ways you can immediately feel more successful in your relationships. When you’re ready to stop and drop the same old patterns of upset in relationships, the tips and tools I offer in this free class will really support you. They’re SO simple, and yet they have a profound effect. You can learn to remember to Partner UP rather than struggling in your relationships, and that feels so good. You can stop playing small and live your calling by ALLOWING healing your relationships. Are you willing to make more loving choices to deepen your spiritual practice and accelerate your awakening by being a healing presence in your family? It’s easier than you think!

TODAY in my FREE CLASS – we’re going to focus on relationships and making a difference BEFORE the holidays!

Every day I offer “My Shot of Spiritual Espresso”.  I write spiritual inspiration and record a prayer for our healing.  Prayer is a power tool for our liberation.  Pray with me today.  The Prayer for Today is for Family Forgiveness Healing.  We use technology to transcend time and space and deepen our spiritual practice and connect with each other.  Our spiritual practice is our path of liberation.  And that’s beautiful to share!

When anyone of us has more happiness, we’re all lifted!

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Relationship Helper

Thursday, September 19th, 2019

Haven’t we had enough of feeling like a failure? I sure have!

One of the greatest relationship helpers I know of is patience. A Course in Miracles, as well as other spiritual paths, tell us that relationship is the fastest path to our waking up. That’s because all relationships require us to release attachments to how we like things and how we don’t like things. Our loved ones teach us to have compassion. Without compassion, relationship is impossible.

I remember that, for much of my life, my biggest problem was my attachments to my opinions about what was good and what was not. I let my attachments to those opinions poison some really valuable relationships. It caused a HUGE amount of drama in my life. I caused myself great pain and suffering, and I inflicted it on others as well.

The way out of all that suffering was to forgive myself. I had to let go of my self-attack thoughts and replace them with self-compassion.

It’s a great relationship helper to realize that giving up the attachments will bring the Peace.

Being right about our opinions will bring no Peace. Being right brings the smallest temporary satisfaction, followed by more guilt – even if we don’t realize it.

We can help our relationships be more loving and more intimate by practicing giving up attachments to our opinions on the littlest things. In this way, we can make every day a victory day. Any little victory I can have over the ego personality is a great victory. I am grateful for each and every one of them. They add up!!

This is how we can undo feeling like a failure all day long! Truly, it works!

When we have a victory over our opinions and attachments, we are lessening the sense of unworthiness that can keep us investing time, energy, and money in all kinds of things that aren’t worthwhile. It’s a RELIEF!

It’s also a blessing that we CAN be successful each day if we choose to take the opportunities that are there for us. Each victory is one we share with all beings. All boats rise on this tide of Love!

Can you think of an attachment you gave up that improved your relationship? Please tell us about it and share in the comments below! Let’s join together for our healing! Thank you!

 

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Testy Texting

Wednesday, September 18th, 2019

I was talking with a friend, one time, who was having a conversation by text with his sweetheart. They were texting about something that was a frustration for them both, and it was showing in their text messages. My friend read me the messages, and it was clear his boyfriend was annoyed with him. My friend was feeling annoyed by the messages and wanted to respond in kind, which is understandable.

Relationships are degraded by these kinds of annoying exchanges.

It’s really easy to wear down the beauty of a relationship with sarcasm. Sarcasm always interrupts intimacy because it makes us feel unsafe.

When we enter into to conversations with comments like: “You forgot to put out the trash AGAIN!” we need to know that what we’re doing is making an effort to make the other person feel bad, guilty, wrong, and shamed. It’s not truly helpful. And, it takes away the sweetness, as well as the safety and intimacy, of our connections.

Who would like to open themselves in deep intimacy with someone who sometimes lashes out at them with sarcasm? No one I know.

Let’s make it a safe space for all of our loved ones and make a commitment to not text or e-mail our annoyances. Let’s also completely stop blaming other people for our upsets.

We can only have holy relationships if we are willing to let them be wholly loving.

This is how we become a catalyst for healing.

Who’s willing to really commit to this? Please tell us about it and share in the comments below! Let’s join together for our healing! Thank you!

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Don’t Give Up On Your Relationship

Monday, July 8th, 2019

When we give up on other people, we’re also giving up on ourselves. And yet, when people are so disappointing and difficult, it’s so tempting to walk away from them. Giving up, quitting, that’s the easy thing to do in the short run. In the long run, it will become a weight that’s not worth carrying.

So, what to do? I get this question a lot.

Consider this: We’re all one with each other. And, we’re all eternal. Therefore, it stands to reason that our relationships are eternal, as well. So while we can certainly SEEM to walk away and end a relationship in this lifetime, it’s only temporary.

Why settle for a temporary solution that will only make things more challenging in the future? Why build into your future a challenge you’ll have to deal with that will be fermenting the entire time between now and then?

How to deal with it in the present moment? Well, you don’t have to keep talking with the person. You don’t have to connect and relate with them in the visible world. Seek not to change another person, but to change your mind about them.

Very few people are really willing to hold the vision of the highest and best in their difficult relationships. It takes a lot more effort than it does to complain.

Complaining never helps. Complaining makes you a crap magnet. Compassion makes you a LOVE magnet. Which would you rather be?

Hold the vision of a healed relationship, and then let Spirit do the healing. Sometimes this can be REALLY challenging. And, it’s also a way to heal your mind.

If you give up on the relationship, you’re giving up on yourself.

Instead of giving up on the relationship, give the relationship UP to the Higher Holy Spirit Self.

Give up your needing, wanting, craving,s and aversions about the relationship. Give up all forms of attachment to the person and the way the relationship “should” be and you’ll have a healing in your heart – but you have to really mean it.

Be willing to hold a vision of healing without an attachment to how it looks.

Focus on how you’d like that relationship to feel – would you like it to feel loving, harmonious, playful, respectful, prosperous, beautiful and more? Hold the vision of that, cultivate that feeling, and give up how you think it should look.

It may take a great willingness, and it may take a while, but then it won’t come back and bite you on the behind, and that’s great! We have other things to do besides recovering from being bitten on the behind!

If you were freaking out or in a rough place, would you wish for SOMEONE to hold the high watch for you? Of course you would. Be that person now!

Professional Trainings for Teachers, Counselors & Ministers

If you think you might like to explore a spiritual career then check out some of my programs like Finding Freedom From Fear and the trainings I offer. I am offering two trainings in October. They are each deeply healing and they are both part of larger professional programs, but anyone can take them.

Right now there are SUPER early bird specials on my “How to Lead & Create A Workshop” training which includes certification to lead my Forgive & Be Free workshop and then there’s my Spiritual Counseling Training Intensive, which is a great program for anyone interested in becoming a better listener, cultivating compassion or intuition.

If you’re a spiritual healer, counselor, or teacher, you might be interested in one of my professional programs. PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE to fill out my latest survey of your interests, please click here now! This way I’ll be sure to keep you informed.

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso” and “Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the “LIKE” button? Also, please like and comment on posts on Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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4th of July

Wednesday, July 3rd, 2019

My family moved from Ann Arbor, Michigan, where my parents met, to Barrington, RI when I was 9 years old. My dad had gotten a teaching position at Brown University. I didn’t like being far away from my grandparents and cousins, but I have to say I really fell in love with New England.

For the many people who read this “Daily Spiritual Espresso” who are not from the United States, you might not know that Rhode Island is the smallest state in the union. It’s just 48 miles long and 37 miles wide, but it has a huge bay in the middle so it can take a while to drive from one side to the other. I venture the longest drive you could make in Rhode Island from end-to-end might be an hour.

Roger Williams founded the first permanent white/European settlement at Providence in 1636 on land purchased from the Narragansett Indians. Williams was forced to flee Massachusetts because of persecution. He established a policy of religious and political freedom in his new settlement. For you trivia buffs, the actual name of the state is Rhode Island and Providence Plantations.

Another bit of trivia is that RI is the most catholic state in the Union. RI went from fleeing religious persecution of the protestants in Massachusetts to becoming mostly catholic because of all the immigrants. Rhode Island has just over a million people, and today 67% of them are still considering themselves catholic.

When I was growing up, the 4th of July holiday was a HUGE deal.

Rhode Island has the oldest Independence Day parade in the United States.

It started in 1785, more than 200 years ago! And when I was a kid, the whole day was one long festivity — getting to Bristol early enough to beat the unbearable traffic and get a good place along the parade route, then going to the beach for a swim and a picnic, going back home for a barbecue, and then back to Bristol in the evening for the fireworks. I love any day that is entirely spent out doors!

And, I love fireworks! Tonight I’ll be in Bristol, Vermont with friends, and we’ll go to the fireworks there. It’s not the same, but it’s still fun. Tomorrow there are parades and festivities, and Bristol has the biggest parade in the state of Vermont, even though it’s a tiny town.

In New England, patriotism is a real thing, and it feels old-fashioned to me.

When I was growing up, as a teenager, many of my friends were from the next town over. I met them through a job I had bussing tables at a restaurant in the next town over, the Wharf Tavern in Warren, RI. I didn’t work there long, but I made some great friends.

My friends were all first and second generation immigrants from Portugal, Poland, and Italy, as well as Canada. Their families were SO glad to be U.S. citizens. They learned the language. They contributed in mostly blue collar jobs, and sent their kids (my friends) to college so they could succeed in white collar jobs.

Rhode Island has fantastic Italian, Portuguese, and other “ethnic” foods, and I discovered the best of those foods at my friends family barbecues and dinner tables all summer long.

I had the best Greek food of my life in Rhode Island until I went to Greece. And still, I never had a doner kebab like I had in Rhode Island.

Columbus Day was a BIG holiday that included lots of Italian food and beer. Rhode Island has developed it’s own little culinary niche with foods like hot weenies, clam cakes (not at all like clam cakes in Maine), stuffed clams and quahogs (a large clam). Clams, clams, clams. Conch. And of course, Italian ice, Del’s was the best ever, and no one else’s compared. 4th of July required intense heat, desperate thirst, and a large Del’s, with real bits of lemon and zest in it. Not hard and frozen — soft and slushy, long before others were having slushy drinks. YUM!

A true patriot was here for freedom from oppression – religious, and political, and willing to fight for it. Many of my friends’ older brothers went to Viet Nam and Cambodia, and came home completely changed. Never to be the same. The happy carefree young men who came back were transformed, but not in a good way. The effects of that rippled through our community.

Families became conflicted about their patriotism after that terrible war and the reasons behind it. Immigrants often send their first generation sons into the military when they land in a new country. Immigrants worked hard to invest in the state, and then were devastated by the Savings and Loan debacle that was fostered by George W. Bush and friends.

Rhode Island’s families has such strong people who have been through so much as a people. They are rebuilding and blooming in many ways now. If you go to Rhode Island and get to Providence, go to Federal Hill to Caserta’s and have a Wimpy Skimpy for me! Best calzone EVER. Best spinach pie ever, too! YUM!

I’m not a xenophobe, but I’m a patriot. I believe in the principles of the founders. I believe that all people are created equal and entitled to certain unalienable rights. I don’t believe in winding back the clock to a time of segregation and discrimination. I believe in liberty and justice for all, and that we have the opportunity to welcome people from other countries.

My ancestors came from the Cherokee tribe and from European nations, and most recently from Ireland during the potato famine. When the Irish came, they were treated quite poorly and they were unwanted, similar to how some feel about the people taking refuge now.

I feel it’s our job to welcome each new wave of immigrants so they can help make America even more beautiful, and even more of a rainbow nation. We can make amends for the mentality that treated my ancestors so poorly and be a nation of global transformation through generosity rather than greed.

It takes a lot of effort to change our own hearts, but that is the only way to change the world. Sometimes sharing a meal with someone who has different food and customs, and getting to know their family and introducing yours to them, is the way the to make the world a better place.

In this world, food is a symbol of Love for many. Especially for immigrants. Food is a symbol of family, and home, and connection.

What are your holiday and family food favorites that you love to share? What are your plans for the 4th? Please comment in the comment section below!

Professional Trainings for Teachers, Counselors & Ministers

If you think you might like to explore a spiritual career then check out some of my programs like Finding Freedom From Fear and the trainings I offer. I am offering two trainings in October. They are each deeply healing and they are both part of larger professional programs, but anyone can take them.

Right now there are SUPER early bird specials on my How to Lead & Create A Workshop training which includes certification to lead my Forgive & Be Free workshop and then there’s my Spiritual Counseling Training Intensive which is a great program for anyone interested in becoming a better listener, cultivating compassion or intuition.

If you’re a spiritual healer, counselor, or teacher, you might be interested in one of my professional programs. PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE to fill out my latest survey of your interests, please click here now! This way I’ll be sure to keep you informed.

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso” and “Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the “LIKE” button? Also, please like and comment on posts on Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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Honoring My father

Sunday, June 16th, 2019

I’ve learned so much from my Father. Some of it I’ve had to unlearn, and some of it has been so helpful to me, beyond any measure. More than anything, I’ve learned about Love, devotion, dedication, commitment and the value of valuing these qualities.

When I was a teenager I had a chores and responsibilities in my family. One time I forgot to do wash the kitchen floor and my Father said “But you remembered to call your friends, didn’t you? You remembered what was important to you.” He was right.

My responsibilities in the family weren’t as important as my friends. To this day, my Father’s words help me to remember what is important is not always the thing that I most enjoy doing and that I always prefer to make a conscious choice. To this day, I am grateful for the lesson learned.

If I choose from what I’m “wanting,” then I’m always left wanting and never having because the wanting never ends. I prefer to be highly intentional with each choice. I AM training my mind to always see and choose the most loving choice.

This has helped me to develop a joyful attitude towards the things that support excellence in my life and in this way I deeply and truly honor my Father.

When I began a practice of daily prayer and meditation it felt like a chore. Very often I didn’t want to do it. My teachers said how much they loved to pray. I didn’t get it. For me it was a task, a burden. It was work to get myself to be still, to take the time. I wasn’t feeling the joy. I wasn’t really receiving the benefits. It was like when I was a teenager. Yes, I “wanted” a clean kitchen floor, a high consciousness, but I also wanted to put my attention elsewhere. If I had not been committed to seeing the higher choice for Love, I’d still be wanting, endlessly wanting.

I see this in so many spiritual seekers. They “want” to be more loving. And, again, wanting and having are two different things. The one who is wanting is not devoted to having and being. Wanting never ends. The one who awakens from the dream of separation is committed to seeking the Kingdom first. This becomes their joy, their devotion and their passion. Wanting is magical thinking. Wanting is thinking something is missing. Nothing’s missing. You must look where you can find it. And that requires devotion. True spiritual success is a living commitment to being loving, even when it’s deeply challenging.

Think of this – if the love of your life was “missing” would you be devoted to finding them? Or would you simply “want” to find them? Look in your heart for the answer. That’s where the love of YOUR life is waiting for YOU!

Ramakrishna taught us, “Work, apart from devotion or love of God, is helpless and cannot stand alone.” Over the years I’ve continued to pray, to meditate and, just like with my yoga practice, I’ve become stronger, more flexible. I’ve felt the cleansing effects of prayer and meditation. The healing has taken over my awareness. Now, I cannot imagine getting out of bed in the morning without praying. I cannot imagine not going back to prayer again and again throughout the day. My practice is the embrace of my Beloved, the One TRUE LOVE of my life. The One who never tires of me. The one who always loves me and offers me the very best without restriction.

Today I demonstrate what is important to me by my devotion, by my practice, by washing the kitchen floor, exercising, smiling, being kind and patient, keeping my appointment with my meditation chair, my prayer partner and my beloved. I show up! And in this way I honor my Father who brought me as well as the one who sent me. In countless small ways I devote myself to the daily practice of showing up with love and kindness. In this way I make a profound contribution to peace in the world, and I am grateful for every experience that brought me to this moment.

Today I’m so very grateful for my father, Danny Hadley. I’ve always felt his commitment to love, to being the best father he could be to me, to caring for me, protecting and providing for me. We’ve had very difficult times and we’ve had glorious times. We are having a journey of love together, and naturally it includes the peaks and valleys.

I know that with every passing year we’re both more interested in sharing with each other the very best of ourselves. The very best is our loving hearts, our kindness, our patience, and generosity. Year after year, we’re learning to be devoted to each other as father and daughter, to the best of our ability. This is cause for celebration.

Many, many times in the past it’s been so challenging, but it’s not challenging like that anymore and we’re grateful for that. My devotion to Love itself has been my healer. I’m grateful that my father was always willing to see the best of me, even when it wasn’t readily apparent to others and even if it took him a minute. That is the gift that we can all give to each other. It’s certainly the best gift a father could ever give a daughter. Today I celebrate my father and I give thanks for him.

I give thanks that my Dad never taught me anything about God and that I got to find that on my own. I’ve never had to undo any false beliefs about the Divine. I particularly give thanks that he taught me to be able to laugh and play, to love good food and great friends, to enjoy music and nature and so much of life. He also helped me learn, above all, that I intend to never miss an opportunity to love again! Thanks, Dad! I love you so much.

Professional Trainings for Teachers, Counselors & Ministers 

If you think you might like to explore a spiritual career, then check out some of my programs like Finding Freedom From Fear and the trainings I offer.  I am offering two trainings in October.  They are each deeply healing, and they are both part of larger professional programs, but anyone can take them.

Right now there are SUPER Early Bird specials on my How to Lead & Create A Workshop training which includes certification to lead my Forgive & Be Free workshop, and then there’s my Spiritual Counseling Training Intensive which is a great program for anyone interested in becoming a better listener, cultivating compassion or intuition.

If you’re a spiritual healer, counselor, or teacher, you might be interested in one of my professional programs. PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE to fill out my latest survey of your interests, please click here now! This way I’ll be sure to keep you informed.

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso” and “Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the “LIKE” button? Also, please like and comment on posts at Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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Mom

Sunday, May 12th, 2019

One of the greatest gifts I gave myself was to let go of the blocks to Love in my relationship with my precious mother. My experience taught me the value and power of true forgiveness. It improved the quality of every moment of my life since then.

Sometimes Love is a decision.
We decide to Love and stop withholding.
We can get there through Self-Forgiveness.

Love is constant. It doesn’t come and go like affection, or kindness, or willingness.

Our very nature is Love.
It’s our nature to be constant in loving, and I know that we are returning to that awareness and that way of living and it is what I practice each day.

What I didn’t know when I was growing up is that one of the reasons why I had so many issues with my mother was that she had so many issues with her self and with her own mother.

I had no idea that I could choose Love and be that fulcrum point of Love in our family. I didn’t know that I could heal the generations.

My journey with my mother helped me to really KNOW the power of Love. And forgiveness is a great act of Self-Love.

There is nothing to be guilty for.
Being guilty is withholding Self-Love.
Forgiveness is the only way out of that pain.

Forgiveness liberates us from withholding Love.
Forgiveness is like water to a seed laying on the surface of a desert. With water there is life and with Love there is life.

One person, one seed, can become an oasis.
That’s what I feel happened for me – all because I decided to do the very forgiveness work that I now share. If I hadn’t done my own forgiveness work, you wouldn’t be reading this right now. Don’t make anything more important. This is it! TRULY!

I became compelled to FORGIVE EVERYTHING when my Mom got a terminal cancer diagnosis.

My whole life has changed because of my practice of forgiveness.
I love what A Course in Miracles says:

“It is as sure that those who hold grievances will suffer guilt, as it is certain that those who forgive will find peace. 3 It is as sure that those who hold grievances will forget who they are, as it is certain that those who forgive will remember.” ~ Lesson 68, Love Holds No Grievances

I decided I was committed to remembering my TRUE identity and letting go of the false. That’s the best decision I ever made – and it still rings through my heart and mind today. I failed every day, but I stayed committed. When I failed, I started again.

My mom made her transition in 2008. I made this video in 2012 and I share it with you now with the intention that it might inspire you to a greater forgiveness. If you would like my support for forgiveness, please check out my free workshop How to Get Over It

It was a tremendous effort for me to let go of the ego’s grievances. And it was absolutely worth every bit of it.

No matter where you are in your relationship with your mother, (or anyone) even if they’ve passed on, you can still completely heal the relationship and experience a holy relationship. Truly, your willingness is all that’s required.

It’s your willingness to forgive yourself. Not them.
Forgive yourself for holding a grievance. Start there.
When we hold grievances, we lose our way in the world.
Fortunately, forgiveness is the way back.

There’s no greater gift that you can give to yourself, your family, and the world than to heal the grievances, of this I am certain. If you are truly willing, even a little bit, Spirit will make a way. The more willing we are, the faster and easier it is.

Ultimately we will choose to let the grievances go. That day WILL come, so why wait? Today is the day!

When I had such a healing with my mother, that’s when I got inspired, compelled even, to create a class to share what I learned that actually worked to heal my relationship with my Mom.

That class was originally called Family Freedom and now I call it Finding Freedom From Fear. People have such amazing results with this class. Have the courage to go for it!

Finding Freedom From Fear REGISTRATION OPENED YESTERDAY
I’m doing something different this year. I haven’t offered this class in 8 months – this is your chance, if you’d like to join me and GO FOR IT! Don’t put your healing and happiness off 1 more day. We will do the forgiveness work together in class.

My Finding Freedom From Fear spiritual boot camp isn’t for everyone – it’s for those who are ready and willing to dive in and live the Love. We’re doing it together!

1st Step is to sign up for a Goal Setting Group Session – these are a gift to you to help you see if you’re actually ready and willing to do this work. There’s no charge – sign up for one now. Finding Freedom From Fear starts June 6. Find out if it’s right for you now with a Goal Setting Group Session.

Goal Setting Group Session sign up now!

Professional Trainings – SUPER Early Bird Special until May 22nd If you think you might like to explore a spiritual career then check out some of my programs like Finding Freedom From Fear and the trainings I offer. I am offering two trainings in October. They are each deeply healing and they are both part of larger professional programs, but anyone can take them.

Right now there are SUPER early bird specials on my How to Lead & Create A Workshop training which includes certification to lead my Forgive & Be Free workshop and then there’s my Spiritual Counseling Training Intensive which is a great program for anyone interested in becoming a better listener, cultivating compassion or intuition.

Finding Freedom From Fear waiting list sign up

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso and Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the LIKE button? Also, please “like” and comment on posts at Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

 

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Manifesting, Life Purpose and Relationships

Thursday, March 14th, 2019

When I first started counseling people, many people were asking for help living their life purpose, healing their relationships, and manifesting the life they desired. These are three main topics that people have in life.

Being successful at living our life purpose, having great relationships and manifesting even the most basic necessities can all seem like a big mystery. We don’t wish to manifest our heart’s desire only to have it slip through our fingers. We’d like to have the consciousness to hold on to it!

Everything in our life is a demonstration of our beliefs. Many times beliefs are hidden, and even though we believe life is abundant, we’re not experiencing it. We can believe that God is Love, but we’re not experiencing it. This can be intensely frustrating.

We feel like a failure, and we know that’s not helpful. We label “not spiritual” and it makes us feel like a fake, adding insult to injury. It doesn’t have to stay that way.

When you think of manifesting, do you think of:

  • Home, Car, Vacations, or
  • Paying the bills, Groceries, Needs of your family, or
  • Life Purpose and Career, Relationships with a partner and friends

If your answer is ONE or ALL of the Above, then I’d like to share with you an event I’m participating in that’s completely free.

Join me speaking with my colleague, Melissa Lilly Nelson, on New Three University’s Manifesting, Life Purpose and Relationships online event. This is my second time doing an event with Melissa, and it may call to you where you are right now.

I agree with Melissa when she shares that “manifesting an abundant life purpose and Supportive Relationships is our birthright!.” It’s our nature to be in the flow of Love, Abundance, Wisdom, and to live our true purpose.

You’re Invited, Click Here to Join Us.

This event is not overwhelming, because the interviews are only 20 minutes each, give great advice, and it’s a small group of teachers so you won’t get a ton of e-mails. And, you can always unsubscribe when you feel complete, but it’s definitely worth giving each person a listen. Enjoy!

If you’re willing to have the courage to heal – we’re going for it – come with us!

UPCOMING IN-PERSON EVENTS

Let’s have some fun with our healing! Spring Clearing Healing Retreat March 20 to 24 – with Lisa Natoli, Corinne Zupko, Jon Mundy, myself and more!

Ready for some healing? If you’re tired of playing small, and feeling like your stuck of blocked, or your just ready to make a leap in consciousness consider joining me this month in one of the great events we have plannedWe have payment plans if you need them.

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso and Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the LIKE button? Also, please “like” and comment on posts at Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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Full Moon Healing

Wednesday, February 20th, 2019

Have you noticed that there’s been some super intense energy in the last few days? I noticed it most intensely Monday and Tuesday morning. This often happens around the time of the full moon! The moon just went full last night and that usually helps bring some relief.

Full moon is a time of healing through releasing what no longer serves. Full moon is also a time of harvest – harvesting the wisdom from our experiences and then releasing any and all attachments – that’s what a full moon healing ceremony is for!

What a time of healing this is! Let’s call forth an amazing healing and release all blocks to Love!

Many believe that extraordinary spiritual growth and expansion are impossible. I used to feel that way. The growth I desired felt so elusive. I just concluded that it was because there was something wrong with me that made it impossible for me.

What’s so cool is that even though I believed it couldn’t work for me, I was willing to shift. My willingness has brought tremendous healing.

So many of the people who begin the year in Masterful Living feel that the healing, expansion and life they desire is not possible for them. They have doubt that what they desire could ever be theirs.

At the end of every year, I talk with folks who, at the beginning of the year, were unbelievers – but not anymore!

Let me just tell you how grateful I feel that I have followed my guidance even when it was REALLY hard for me. I am so grateful and here’s why:

It’s because of hearing people’s stories of what changed for them in our Masterful Living community.

Imagine starting the year feeling that this is the year you’re going to file for divorce. It’s clear, the writing is on the wall in every room of your house. You and your spouse just aren’t compatible and there’s nothing you can do about it – you’ve tried everything you can think of.

But then, you decided to really live a simple spiritual practice. You decided to give the relationship to the Higher Holy Spirit Self for healing and you made the effort to leave it on the altar and begin to hold the vision for a holy relationship. And your relationship began to improve and heal and become something really beautiful. I see it happen every year to many people in our community.

Year after year, I hear the beautiful and truly profound stories of people making the mental shifts that heal their life and relationships.

And the healing happens even though they don’t believe.

It’s life-changing.
When we experience these kinds of healing, then we’re changed forever.

I invite you to really go for it this coming year – focus on your willingness!

Cultivate a willingness to learn that the miracles will happen for you when you’re willing to practice and give Spirit a chance.

I have collected so many beautiful stories. Each one is a precious jewel.

It does take willingness. And that’s what spiritual community helps with. Together, we hold the light for each other so we don’t give up.

One time I spoke with someone who had decided to give up and drop out of class. She was so sure it couldn’t work for her that she was all set to withdraw.

And then she talked with someone in the community about it and changed her mind.

And now, she’s helping others to not give up, because where she was once constantly worried, she’s found peace. And she’s so grateful now she’s inspired to help others in achieving their goals with their spiritual practice. She was CONVINCED it couldn’t work for her, but it did.

We replace the old thought with the new thought and we’re on our way to a new experience of Peace and Harmony! It’s easier than you think to change everything in your mind and your life, if you’re willing.

Also – if you’re willing, come away with me for your healing!

Early bird special on NOW Spring Clearing Retreat March 20 to 24 – with Lisa Natoli, Corinne Zupko, Jon Mundy, myself and more! Plus, Jon Mundy and I are offering our Leading & Creating A Workshop training which includes certification to lead my Forgive & Be Free Workshop! March 14 to 20. Register for both and receive an additional discount. Click now for details!

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso and Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the LIKE button? Also, please “like” and comment on posts at Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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1 Goal

Friday, February 15th, 2019

There are many who are challenged with conversations right now because either they are upset and hurting or the people around them are upset and hurting. So much is getting stirred up right now that people are frightened and angry and taking it out on each other.

In A Course in Miracles it tells us so clearly, “The sole responsibility of the miracle worker is to accept the Atonement for himself.”

What does that mean? It means our one responsibility in our entire life is to accept that this world as an illusion and a projection and everything that we think we hate is a projection of self-hatred. Every upset is really self-upset projected outwards.

When we can have compassion for those who seem to bother us we are having Self-compassion and that is the way out of hell.

As people who Love the Light, we are here to be truly helpful and remember that everything in this world is an opportunity for us to Love ourselves free of any and all delusions and illusions and that is the one thing that everything is for. Let’s not make up stories about what things are for, let’s just accept what they are REALLY for and get on with it.

The time is now for waking up! Let’s give all the heavy lifting of figuring out HOW and learn to ALLOW the Higher Holy Spirit Self to guide us.

If we focus on our one goal, the Spirit WILL show us the way. The Light of Love within us WILL light the way! It’s much easier than we think. We can learn through joy rather than suffering! Now is OUR time!

ANNOUNCEMENTS: Two in-person events next month Early bird special on NOW Spring Clearing Retreat March 20 to 24 – with Lisa Natoli, Corinne Zupko, Jon Mundy, myself and more! Plus, Jon Mundy and I are offering our HOW TO CREATE & LEAD A WORKSHOP training which includes certification to lead my Forgive & Be Free Workshop! March 14 to 20. Register for both and receive an additional discount. Click now for details!

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso and Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the LIKE button? Also, please “like” and comment on posts at Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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Responsibility in Relationship

Tuesday, February 12th, 2019

Today on my radio show I’ll be sharing about responsibility in relationship. Being able to take responsibility for our feelings is the way out of most people’s experiences of relationship misery. It’s amazing how much gratitude we can have when realize we’ve been doing it to ourselves and we can stop!

Last night in Masterful Living, one of the things we were discussing was guilt. Many people feel guilty for a variety of reasons, and that guilt is like a wet, stinky blanket on their life and on their energy field. Let’s get rid of it!

Guilt is not really my thing. When I was a kid, my grandmother would often try to make me feel guilty in order to manipulate me, and I learned to throw that off. I developed a Teflon coating for guilt. It still comes up from time to time, and I’ve learned a lot about how to let guilt go.

The number one way to release the guilt is to not put guilt on anyone else. It’s like I say all the time:

the judger always feels judged
the attacker always feels attacked
the lover always feels beloved

Let’s add: the guilt-er always feels guilty (and secretly ashamed)

Which would you like to feel — Guilty or Beloved? You’re in charge of your choices, so why choose to feel guilty and ashamed when you could feel Beloved?

You may be trying to make people feel guilty and, perhaps, not even be aware of it. When you’re upset, if you feel in ANY WAY that it’s someone else’s fault, and you tell them you’re upset – you’re probably, perhaps unconsciously, trying to blame them and make them feel guilty and ashamed. This will only cause you to feel guilty and ashamed – perhaps unconsciously. Next thing you know, you’re depressed and self-medicating. Yuck – the wet, stinky blanket of despair has landed, self-inflicted. Ugh.

If you believe that you have the power to make other people happy, to fix their lives, to rescue them or heal them, and you withhold Love from them, you probably will feel guilty because you might also be punishing them, consciously or unconsciously.

If you feel upset, and you feel it will help you to tell other people about it, make sure you don’t feel they’re responsible. If you do feel they’re responsible for your feelings, then take ownership of it like this:

“I’m feeling upset and I know it’s not you’re fault. It’s my crazy thinking. I’d like to talk it through with you, so that I can take total responsibility for my thoughts and feelings and heal this crazy thinking. Are you willing to help me talk it through?”

However, if you have a secret desire to blame them and shame them for “making you” feel upset, then don’t go talk with them – unless they’re really skilled at being able to recognize you’re exposing your crazy secret desire to blame and shame. Responsibility is the way out. Taking TOTAL ownership of our feelings is the only way to have a truly healing and productive conversation.

Remember, the ego loves to pick a fight, to blame and to shame and that will only leave you feeling guilty and ashamed. There’s just no benefit to trying to make others responsible for your upset. Heal that habit, and your life will become more loving, more prosperous and more harmonious! Woo-hoo!

TODAY RADIO SHOW: my topic is Responsibility In Relationship. You can listen in LIVE on my radio show – click here for details – or you can click here to get the download later at iTunes or Stitcher for Android. All the previous episodes are free at iTunes & Stitcher right now! Transcripts and more are available here: LivingaCourseinMiracles.com  You can subscribe to the podcast and get the show every week automatically on your phone, iPod, iPad or computer. Check it out! And if you enjoy the radio show, will you please write a review so more people find the show? The more reviews, the more iTunes and Stitcher show it to people! Thank you!

If you find my “Daily Spiritual Espresso and Prayer for Today” helpful, won’t you please share at Facebook and click the LIKE button? Also, please “like” and comment on posts at Facebook. This helps, as Facebook will let more people see it and become inspired, too! Thank you!

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